is it this place, or is it ME?

Aesthetics

2010-03-16T23:19:00.003+08:00

The pleasure has radiated into a whirlpool of desires, locked with unearthed feelings, racing against time ..as if.. wasted, wretched and not forgiven. Days pledged by outer beauty and mirage of strangers, unworthy or plausible to be kept of? Though I have been taught about patience, waiting is still dying. Each second feels like fire on wood, beaming insanely huge. The Behemoth has cast its fiery flare on me, caging me like the blue fire, unable to escape to the atmosphere, but burning at the highest temperature. At the time when Lavender arrives with an icing pulsation, I wonder does my mind take a deep dip and run beneath the caked icy surface.. trapped under the unknown freezing waters like a lost narwhal finding a hole to breathe upon.

2010-03-02T10:45:00.003+08:00

For the things I do not have, they are an ever chase.

For the things I had, they painted my white piece colourful.

For the things I have, I am succumbed to its anticipation, desire and exhilaration factors.

I have to comment

2010-02-24T23:55:00.006+08:00

I want to write down coz I wanna remember you.

Yesterday, I wore a rather bright pants and he commented, then we had a stroll and being chatty about recent... all the way to the canteen. Today, I wrote on the whiteboard and he commented too on our similarity, which is .. just about 10% of us exist in this world. Judging from his expression, he was delighted. Also having the same type of thinking as we laughed silently during one session of disagreement with the other party. As if we clicked, but just not yet.. I mean, we were at the Operation and Management training, I was enthusiastic and he was yawning away, making the trainer calling his name to do a readout. Haha. During the break, he asked me for fussball and then we had a good game, yea right, being trashed right out by a pro but still enjoyed it much. Crazy pair and he was indeed a very different partner. Then, I watched him played bomberman..with such extreme excitation.. weird fella but very special.

He's a genius who showed us only his silly side.

He did almost everything from camel riding to scuba.

His words are prudent, sharp, non-judgemental and opinionated.

His thinking is an ocean.

He went to SDU at 24.

It's a pity he's going back to the States soon. All these talks and knowing each other..though, I know you belong there, you smelled like a New York dude.. most importantly, your thinking were absolute, fair and non-judgemental. I did enjoy the times we spent together very much, not forgetting the dance we nailed at the wedding at the quest of your invitation...I wish you all the best, and hope you could get into Standford, marry a nice girl.. and get on with life as it is.

Going home is sweet

2010-02-07T23:47:00.004+08:00

Since when you had became so significantly great these days, I don't know why. Knowing that all the sparks we had, as if we could read each other's mind, oh yes we do..till now.. The times you would look back at me, only to me.. smiling for a reason. Now, you would still come by me.. sit by my side, watch me..i felt that not a word is more than enough.. You are not my knight, never my everything.. couldn't be.. but you are my history, my time turner, my medicine on wounds that won't heal a thousand years. I guess we never made our goodbyes.. never did the hellos..

Hi February 2010

2010-01-30T13:48:00.003+08:00

Time is really quick and it doesn't give a damn about a thing. Well, hopefully it will slow down a little as Chinese New Year arrives.. ^_^

Anyway, reading my CLEO leftovers on internal body fat and career coaching, almost missed these great articles way back. I was also reading about an interview posted out by jj.. though we really crossed opinions, but the excerpt was an eye opener to amateurs like me about world leaders.. Now let's see where's the link.. Yeah, I would like to coincide with a laughter phrase some gila old woman sent me recently..

Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

~Ronald Reagan

You might not get it for the first time, if yes then you have the credits. Maybe you would like to google for 'world's oldest profession' to get a better understanding..

I forced this to be a stay-in weekend. Too much bullshit party and work since when. Well, it was nice to sleep at 10pm and woke up at 8am though, enough, early and plenty of time. Perhaps a little discipline won't kill. The crude badminton sessions got my old joints cranking, but sports always feel darn good.

January was all that ground work, exams, meeting a lot a lot of people till you get tired, work, work, work and surprisingly each day passed with more meaning instead of those dying days. February will be a place to rip the ripen fruits. It is really overwhelming and I've really got nothing to say.. I just need to be frank and keep my fingers crossed. I mean.. I am looking at this, people around me are looking at it too.. and i anticipate their expression.. and my own feelings as well.. I wonder how would it hit me?

I am really looking forward to be home as always, get to drive, eat and sleep like a pig. It's a week plus more and it's getting exciting!! and gonna hug that canny pup of mine!!!!!

Chinatown (牛车水)

2010-01-24T22:09:00.013+08:00

garrrr.. comelnyer ^_^

tiggie year ^_^... Blurred because got chased by uncle half way taking this..

fake blossom cherry in front of the "Tooth Relic" Temple ..mui fa take one

real ones..mui fa take two..

paper wind chimes.. fung che

tang yuen with ginger soup~ yummy~

cute dolls?

it's called... lucky grass doll =))

big broom brush for BIG WORDS.. =))

dried plums... chi peng *in cantonese as in duri biskut, direct translation

and the usual bamboo abuse....

HAVE A HAPPY TIGER YEAR ^_^ ! (duno the word is what)

Finally have some time

2010-01-23T23:34:00.002+08:00

Hi dearest bloggy,

I know that my blog has been rather lengthy, most probably a lot of things running in my mind but difficult to be conveyed in a comfortable manner.. and it has been less pictures ever since.. due to end of university life, less sparks, more routine, blah blah.. and i don't want to show you my overweight face here :P but i know all of you reading this could not love me less.

The temptation is high, feeling rather stoical tonight brings numbness and peace. These are the golden years. If you don't suffer now, when will you? I taste the sweet among bitter, I see what I haven't seen before and feel very multidirectional. How much could we remember after this?

If you think you are having a hard time...

Think war zones, where people could hardly keep themselves alive

Think of countries where food is so limited, people eat to live..not live to eat

Think of orphans who does not have a family at all..

Think of the less fortunates who need helping tools to walk, to hear and to live..

Think of all the things that you have....

Think of all the things that other's don't have...

Gah.. we should live on.. despite which direction, where ever I will be in time to come and be with the people that I would belong to..

WORRY? Succumb to it, worry it. Do not prevent from worrying, it will only cause suffocation. Worries never cease but they are like passerbys.. you'll never recall nor remember each that has walked through..

Missing it, missing it so so much.. tell them, tell him.. It feels good.. no regrets. And you'll know the answer..

Read Yasmin Ahmad's blog today, totally blown away. Feeling to rewind and become an artist instead.. haha.. Am I easily inspired, influenced and blended into? I guess I shall grab a cuppa and continue reading.. the night is young and saturday could not feel any less great in its ways... :)

Remember to go home this chinese new year ^_^

陈伟联 - 我们 (当我们同在一起主题曲）

2010-01-17T03:27:00.004+08:00

What to do with all these misery on my mind? Absence of knowing forbids me to for tell what's written in front... a bit drunk now, haha.. the wine and beer lasted me home.. and all those music and people around, just too jolly good on a saturday night..

it's gonna be a cold cold place if everything comes through with an answer. Fuck. I hate to leave..

Windy..

2010-01-12T13:34:00.002+08:00

Today seems a bit empty to write about anything.. I think everyone is getting on with their lives. Will they occasionally feel what I feel sometimes? What do you think about everyday when you wake up together with or before the sun rise? Do you see your rainbow? or just another path to hell every morning..

Most of the time, i will be late in the morning, so chasing buses and trains are just a norm.. thus, it takes off most of the things i don't wanna think about.. If my brain gets a lil bored, i'll think of impossible dreams like.. flying a hot air balloon all by myself around the globe, go for camel racing in the desert, maybe go back to Ipoh and do absolutely nothing for a year or two.. go and confess to the boy who is married/engaged (LOL kidding..okay maybe serious =)) ).. THEN.. perhaps maybe something rather achievable.. pick up guitar, learn swedish, do boat helming at the yacht, cooking lessons (fried rice, french gourmet.. now i feel that chopping garlics can make you go into deep thinking too..no doubt people cut their fingers most of the time =.="), a carribean deep dive, hmm hmm... and maybe a super light weight Boot Camp-ed mac pro..

ok coming back.

Today is a good day.. because it is. hahahaha. have a nice day :)

Finish me, says the chocolate

2010-01-02T20:21:00.004+08:00

Hi there, happy new year :) Welcome 2010, means welcoming the quarter century number, as well as the quarter life crisis altogether.

Anyway, has been watching a real heart-breaking movie called THE COVE on new year's day. People, you guys should really catch a hold of it. If you can't, write me your address, i'll post it to you in a week's time. It talks about dolphin killings in a small town name Taiji in Japan. Well it kept me depressed for more than 24 hours, I think maybe for the rest of my life. It reveals the 'role' of the governments of the world, relevant organization towards this issue, corruption, denial, blame and all the things that you could thought of which could be a solution, is not a solution at all. WWF is not in the picture at all.What are we actually doing to mother earth ... What are in those cruel brains seriously? It isn't even money. They do it because it is an instructional culture. The west ask them to stop, they do it even more. Cried so much on this documentary, seriously, heart aching.

Experiencing it myself, green sustainability itself in Singapore, they build exhibitions before laying out proper conservation steps. The organization, they contact the media, they get the ministry people and ministers in, they make sure the government knows what they are doing, making meetings, spending money on food, experts presentation... but where are the steps to prevent global warming and nature conservation? They don't even have a recycle bin to be seen anywhere. Anyway, Singapore has no nature to preserve.

Let's not talk specific. Look at human's act, we are not doing anything about it. We have no awareness, no obligation to even care, and just get on with our sweet life. When i write in to help, they turn deaf ears. So now i wonder, where the donation really goes to. I myself is guilty in crime too. Before i went down to the sea beds, how immature i was to think that everything was as beautiful as drafted in Disney's Little mermaid, but it's not. We have nothing much left. We will lose this all very soon.

Ignorant fools we are, the main villain which destroys the earth's most precious gift to us. That's how dirty humans are. In 50 years, we will loose all nature, and kill ourselves inadvertently towards greed.

2009-12-22T21:10:00.004+08:00

Life

does not always need to be ...

listen to people,

starts with straight As,

get a phd,

live with a job,

have success,

get married before 30 or get married at all,

temper throwing at spouse during pregnancy,

have kids,

throwing things at spouse due to mid-life crisis,

starts to worry coz you're getting fat,

starts to shout when wrinkles come say hi as your new friends,

start thinking that my husband or wife is having an affair,

children doesnt talk to me?

what if my retirement funds finish before i die?

what if i don't die, fall sick, nobody cares, left alone in the old folks' home, got depressed till the day they found you dead in the sick bed...

Maybe a better picture like...

have lots of sex, cannabis and smoke,

going casual with comfortable people or people you like,

you have quarter-life-crisis,

quit your monotonous job,

go see the world,

do something really silly once in a while,

challenge yourself towards something you really like to do but dare not till now,

like bikini parties, skydiving, dancing in the streets,

then you realised you're dead broke and achieve nothing at pass 30,

and you feel, i can't be doing nothing anymore,

then you would start to find something you'd like to do,

stay as a poor man with a post office job or kindergarten teach,

or do some real daredevil business investment till you strike dead rich or dead bankrupt,

you don't need to know what you'll do, it's all pure imagination, (you won't do it anyway)

then you don't know when you'll fall sick,

don't know where you'll end up at,

and don't know when you'll die off just like that.

Do you have friends like mine

2009-12-18T22:48:00.005+08:00

Have you ever had someone who walk with you in the streets at midnight in town just to catch supper? without knowing how dangerous the situation is, we still laughed till we catch a taxi back to the suburbs. Days without car. Poor and happy, youth and history.

Will never forget my first day in Taekwondo. From white to brown.

Do you go out for supper at 3am and come back at 5am, before you know it, you're out there eatin dimsum at that old sucky dimsum shop. But still laughed though the food taste awful. The wind so cold, amidst of a few pairs of baggy eyes facing you to make your ha kaw taste better.

Waved bye to the girl who went up the bus. The girl who always asked us to go sit at the swing. The girl who asked you to yumcha though she tells you she wants to sleep early. The girl who tells you she's busy watching drama, ttyl, yet she's still talking to you. The girl who tells you everything yet nothing. The girl who wrote my history, and still is writing.

You go to tesco at 7am to buy ingredients to boil soup back at your apartment's very limited kitchen. You go to tesco at 11pm to catch the almost last pieces of chicken to cook at a luxurious apartment down at klebang.

You get invited to go climb the narrowest hill in the neighbourhood that could practically have the most breath-taking scenery after a hard day or week. Before i reach the hill side, i'll always take a peep at a nearby friend's house, wishing that she could see us, wondering if she would see us.

Saturday night. We'll always whine about how bored our nights are, and not another second to loose, we'll get dressed up and suited up, heading all the way downtown with the pimps to cleanse ourselves at an old place called pure. So, you purify, and another good week ahead.

If we feel really really horrible, due to school work or emotional unstable, then we can just sit around looking at each other, without even needing to talk a word or two. maybe until 5am?

Have you ever pass up your thesis without brushing your teeth?

I get asked often, "Why you have friends like that?" I said, "Dunno wor. hahaha". They say," Why your friends all so weird wan?" I replied,"You are my friend also :)"

The very common teh ais, which brought us through the midnights and dawns. The late super hungry yet enjoyable dinners at mamak when the early rise town left us without a choice or two.

I have a friend who really likes teevee. and weehee. and bwee meeee. and that's so ever kewl. And all the guys think she's a goddess. But for me, you are my baybeh.

She's very good in everything. I didn't even look at her back at those days. and all those started with a simple lunch but horrible food, maybe two lonely people i guess.

I duno. I dun really remember a lot of people.

I only remember the kelapa sawit story. Then, gone my chan to sit Peugeot liao lor. Then he likes to pimp all the girls, and gay with all the guys. I wonder if his ass ever gets an off day.

I dun really have a lot of friends. Sometimes i feel life is so bored to have so few friends. You hate it so much because you don't see them often. I'm no saint. I don't buy bullshit, I don't even buy my guy's bullshit.. but i buy my friends' bullshit.

Wrapping Up

2009-12-13T15:27:00.004+08:00

It's year end and always do what we always do.. wrapping up 2009 and resolutions for the coming 2010. It's like house keeping, but in the end, it gets all messy and dirty as well.. and it gets rolling

In 2009..

(1) Career path moved from research to industrial based

(2) Got my Open Water diver license in Tioman

(3) Celebrated Labour's Day & Arthur's Day at KL

(4) Moved to a new place

(5) 2 close family members rested in peace

(6) Decided to do Masters

(7) Went to Sabah for diving again :D

(8) My dog had puppies

(9) House in ipoh had renovation

(10) Singapore for a year is getting very boring but the Singaporean hunks are getting hotter

In 2010..hopefully

(1) Get out of Singapore

(2) Climb the corporate ladder

(3) Property research

(4) Europe backpacking

(5) West Malaysia, East side road trip

(6) Advance diver in Maldives

(7) Talk to him more

(8) Get in shape

(9) Almost forgot...excel in my TOEFL!

(10) Write more often :)

It's a deliberate 10 item list, yes it is.. to confine significance, and to pick myself up from all those messy dirty shit, and move on..hopefully to a better year. To those far from home this season, have a merry snowy xmas :) Happy New Year and Happy Holidays to all!

Captured in Tioman

Additional resolution for the love of the underwater world:

(1) Quit eating shark fin and anything related to turtle in chinese recipes

(2) Use less plastics

(3) Participate in seabed cleaning exercise

The crawling nights

2009-12-09T02:13:00.003+08:00

At times like this, a sudden gush sent me a message through that I would really like you to know I still care. But seems like, fate does not underlay everything. Most probably all these while it's really about me, and not about you, you and you. I did not persevere, I did not make the effort, I was selfish, stinky and lazy. I was the cynic you could not accept but adored dearly.

Almost lived up my quarter of century. My mind seems to be fully disdained tonight, in fact purely for the whole day. I could not live up to being emotional aside at work. It seems easy, but it's hard, I could not. I lost someone last week. Thinking back of the people i loved and cared all these while, worth or not worth, there were no regrets. I begin to hate myself for not treasuring the people around me back then, I hate the ticking chimes, which obliviously took away all my happy times. What if one day, it was again to happen and not just 'someone' but .. someone i can't live without, someone so precious to even count for.. How to accept? How will it do me? It will always be a loosing war towards death. Sad. Terrified to even think of. Why must there be goodbyes? Where do you go after that?? Answer me, anyone...

Glory Glory

2009-11-26T00:04:00.002+08:00

Music: One by One, The Calling

Book : The Post Office, Charles Bukowski

Mood: Heavy but Happy and Excited to be home

Hell week almost done, left one more day to go. Today was a massive battle in the afternoon at the meeting room, where so many staring eyes judging your performance, your presentation, your capabilities, your body, your clothes, all of you. It's like stepping into the land of mines, where unknown land mines are laid unnoticeably. One wrong step, one wrong word and harvest the homing missiles. There was I, trying to deploy and convince my idea, my creation, my work to the big bang table. It came too fast to even feel any of it, and gladly, there was some agreeable verdict, thank god, hard work (not really hard work) got paid off. At least it didn't waste away my thinking acids. It was so spontaneous, you could die of spontaneity. And can't believed i presented for 1 hour plus without any aids at all! That's scary. And i wanted to talk more even, hillariously unbelievable as i use to think how could people just stand in front there and talk so long, how could my boss always hovers like an annoying bee, how how, i will never and can never do that. and now i am doing it @.@..

Anyhow, the worst for today is over. Let's start facing the worst of tomorrows and never ending tomorrows.

As most of us are awaiting to harvest the ripen fruit, of what we call bonus, incentive, 13th month, AWS(Annual Wage Supplement), motivation, whatsoever you call it... i am finally feeling it.. not that it paid off the hard work shit, but more to i really deserve this badly to pay the bills and put bread and butter on the table. HAHAHAHA. For the first year of working life, you barely knew where you were heading, but when it hits the second, you somehow know where you are going.. maybe not to the ideal place, but the least, some place not unknown.

So now i am feeling the glory of being the household hope, or what my family likes to call it "the big water hose", which supplies water sufficiently to keep everyone clean and warm. Very brief, it feels so darn good bringing home money. It's not really the money, it's about fulfilling your role. The baggage is getting heavy, but by carrying it, i have satisfaction. It really feels good to finally be useful, to be the one sharing the burden, and seeing your love ones stop worrying about you, increasing the inch of trust and letting you take the lead. The reverse lead has taken its toll.

I hope i can do more for them. I hope the road is not rocky. I hope it will come true. But it's okay if nothing does, i will still be me, just the directions differing. Maybe we can plan a little in life, but never expect the fruits to be a definite sweet.

The winds of the summer sea

Be it as it can be

Go as you may sail

Go as you may trail

Colour me rainbow

Peering through like a growing sow

Are you looking?

Yes I am looking

For the rainbow's end pot of gold

Good night, and may you have a great rest in the long weekend ahead! (mine would be longer, haha)

The profound literaries

2009-11-15T01:56:00.006+08:00

I am not wholly ready for my Shakespeare's complete collection, don't even dare to sneak a word or two. That's why I bought it for $9.90 at a book fair to keep it forever in the cabinet :P I am currently into Oscar Wilde, absolutely thumbs up! De Profundis, all you need to know about the soul of socialism, can't wait to finish it because it is so emotionally arousing!! And, for the second time, re-borrowing Voltaire's Dictionary, only selecting distinct titles to read off, yet, still such an enchanted book about mankind. I am keen to find more books about Sun Yat Sen, and maybe proceed to some warfare items. Visited his historical sites in both Penang and Singapore, inspirational.

I skipped Da Vinci's at Singapore Science Centre few months ago, thinking the description was rather for kids, however, feeling kind of regretted that i missed it though. Wished to visit the Louvre one day..to witness his original works and some of the greatest creation which created the future we ever behold.

Found out that Tchaikovsky was gay on Friday. Damn, i have always loved his pieces, very intriguing and specifically sounding. Though i have not played the piano for almost a decade now, i still appreciate old classicals a lot. And i could say, it soothes and solves problems at times.

Most of the namely great people are gay, Wilde was gay too, but he wrote like a goddess. I admire their courage to commit to the most unnatural at that decade which was almost impossible to accept indifference or adversities. To modify perspectives, to create individualism and to push mankind to another level. Very very inspiring.

Literature, music, art and culture are such beautiful literaries that gave man his profound colour. I love it and will love it forever more till the day I stop existing.

A Thinker's Button

2009-11-05T15:52:00.007+08:00

I am very deluded. Why didn't our education system made us more indifferent? Rather just cloning our brains as workers, non-thinkers, restricted capabilities and in the worst, EQ isn’t in the list at all. Indifferent in the senses of striking creativity, opinionate subtleties and having the will of its own to create a borderless society.

It is sad but we have to admit that we are still following, and not even any near behind.

There was a distinct conversation with and between my two colleagues in the car one late night. Asians are programmed to be more averaged, less bad, less good, neither maximum nor minimum, to stay at a manageable level and always encrusting a harmonious propaganda as our crucial objective. Westerners are less programmed, but trained to use their own thinking in performing tasks. So the good or bad is not programmed, but based very lot on the personal character to grow into it. They have a lot of peaks, whilst, us do not even dare to dream of the peaks. They are very successful people, yet, could be big fat villians. For them, consequences are experience, nothing is good nor bad. We are people who 'think' we wanna be happy, live for a better life. Therefore, we work towards that, most of the time, forgetting about dreams, the impossibles, for only rationalities lived. We are different from them, but none other indifferent from each of us. They are unique, successful in their own ways and rude.

Their country produces leaders, creators, entrepreneurs, masterminds. We produce workaholics, followers, weak minds. To be at par, we need to be substantially different, but I have to say, to be the latter has much more happiness than the aforementioned. Balancing the universe, we tend to lose one when we grasped another. When we already have one set of character cemented into our souls, it seems too difficult to be true to cast another type into the same soul. A lot of us are working to it, and that is where virtues start to run loose, ethics disappear and most probably love and pity does not work on you anymore. If one chooses integrity, honesty and good angelic acts, you are easily succumbed to the dark society. Aren’t you at middle-of-no-where? All in all, I don’t mean having one thing will definitely make you lose the other, but you most probably would. If you could grasp the best of both worlds, then you are one lucky person on the streets.

If you want it, you need to work along all your ways to get it. If you do not want it, never hope, never dream, never think like you ever want it as it will feel like a mundane torturous grail of poison that barely keeps you alive.

Some things are just worthless. I am not saying it is better to be at the other side of the river, but it does looks greener. And things, as it is, does not last.

I'm getting interested on business politics -- too much revolution readings argh >"<

2009-10-25T13:51:00.002+08:00

Business is just getting interesting. Considering now at a momentary rest point, after going through a hell of turbulence...finally achievements and subsequent expectations are, too, momentarily subdued.. only thinking..when will again this road of mine diverge again..

Isn't it ironic? It is just funny living off two countries, distance too near to be true, yet, contrasting so vast. Home land is asking the people to pay RM50 tax per credit card.. while here in the land of 'less-freedom' ..banks are calling up individually, considering they really invest a lot a lot in service and interpersonal issues...offering us, least, the employed taking up free credit cards, as many as you wished, with overdrafts ever ready for you. No matter how you showed your temperament weather, they shelter and cushion it well to achieve the ultimate persuasion. Although you might give them a piece of your vocal overdue cheese cake, they persevere and end the conversation with a surmount politeness, i.e. 'thank you very much for your precious time'. I transcend, perhaps employees here just needed to abide to customers or potential customers to maintain their broth providing wages in bad terms like this. And our dearest Prime Minister, Encik Najib binti bla bla is ushering the people aloud stressing that RM50 is not a problem. Let's say since you are the tunggak of tanahair, why not just YOU try sponsoring us first for the first few rounds? To show that, you walk ahead, and the people will follow you closely behind??

No, it is not a small issue when puny stuff like that is obliviously illogical imprudence. Where did those heartfelt forefathers went? It is essential necessary to speak up especially we are the crucial users all these years. Why make things more difficult and not better? The education system is ruined, lucky that a few have survived. Corruption is as simple as buying my boss a cup of coffee. No to mention about the many many many other uncountable misleading decisions....

Also, on the bright side, thanks to you we have learned the act to take care of our own asses. We have unconsciously developed unity WITHOUT any hand from you, the stinky government. We know how to help each other through bad times, treasure priceless happiness and matured accordingly with harsh situations.

Why is it that when we already have the best of things in life, you would like to irritate and destroy our so-called perfect life that we have perceived?

Nursery and kindergarten :)

2009-10-18T19:47:00.002+08:00

dun bite me!

Moody afternoon

Nap...zzzz

Rollin' roLLin'~

Fidgety

2009-10-10T23:46:00.004+08:00

Can't stream any fucking thing tonight. FrUstrated so what the hell let's write. What a dizzy saturday man. Week days has been hectic. Wanting to sleep real bad but the music has kept me hanging aloof. Wanted to read too, but again, my mac just kept me away whole night. Chuck and Larry is a funny show.. what if my movies ran out, i'm gonna die of dehydration.. I wonder how's everyone back home?

let's go to bed. An early Saturday. And maybe a bad bad week ahead. sigh.

The blogging worm

2009-10-01T15:15:00.004+08:00

I would consider the art of laziness has perpetually destroyed a part of me, and awakened another sector of hidden liaison. Holidays have ended.

Finally, the verdict has been sounded and yes, i could feel the new milestone stacking up. New life coming up soon. As predicted, October is gonna be a so serious month. New place and new people. I was telling one friend over Facebook the other night about, great people and good places seldom or almost never coincide. Even if they do, best of things do not last long.

I have mastered the art of mixing up truth.

People are so casual today and i am not telling. This office, which i will miss truly when i detach shall be a reminiscent worth hanging up the wall. 1 year has been good. I am just afraid i will forget. I am the worst at stalling.

I hope i am ready to walk out of the circle and join the other precinct out there.

No, i am not changing my job :P and yes, it is career advancement, but it is a one way indescribable complexity that you would decline to hear of. I should start playing back those tapes. Like i played when i graduated from undergraduate. Surprisingly, today's clock ticks slightly slower, and that feels so damn good.

I should find time to upload some recent trip photos here. Life is too much and too easy to be missed.

A meticulous mimicry

2009-09-29T23:10:00.003+08:00

The act was of obvious reluctance which simple men could portray as much as they wanted too. For i despise as much as i disrespect, ironically, the first person dwells as much as further. The pantomimist did a great job. It was just a passing scene. When the princess came to the balcony, induced as she was, to hum to the hymns, into a poetic trance which could bring her to, the unceasing feeling. As the moon smirked and beamed lowly, people gained the day and put the rest for tomorrow. For she was the one that seemingly accompanied till dawn. As much as the audience applauded, as quick as time passed by, the charade was nothing more than a night of show.

Feeling ardent

2009-09-28T00:28:00.002+08:00

Yes. as usual, at this point of half past midnight, i am still hogging on my mac and yet to clean up myself to serve my bed. Just got back from the F1 race, feeling pretty overwhelmed with the bazooka frequency and a detour to a further MRT entry for a less crowded journey home. I am dirt dirty now with all the sweating from the race, but witnessing Hamilton grabbed the Grand Prix made the worth.

Has been superb busy with non-work related events and readings have been left everywhere too. October is swarming by soon. Would it be a more serious month? More concentration on work that is definitely. Some lifestyle advancement would be ideal, hopefully. There are also a few bullets i need to complete, and some are still idling. Always waiting for answers, that's what i always do. But not all i get them. Sometimes happy, sometimes down. I should switch this to somehow happy, somehow down doesn't matter.

Realizing things is rather than not realizing it at all for the rest of your life.

Ardently, we shall plunge into this life, not fate.

Fate is self-determined, it can't be avoided but altered.

We must chase the wind like a happy kid.

Find time to stroll.

Dance to what we feel to,

and Love the ONE truly.

Finally started reading Reveries of a Solitary Walker by Rosseau, on my due date. The library is always darn so far away.

Knowing that the career path will be getting steeper and challenging starting next month ahead, i can't help but trying to let the maximum loose out of my head. Maybe i'll work like nuts all cranked up for the next one year. I hope not. I hope i could really get something out of it. Not waste my time least. The path is pretty laid out, time to walk on it ... i wonder would i feel barefooted?

The thinning time

2009-09-10T23:32:00.005+08:00

Some things you can't feel it no more. Instance of a display overlooking retail items, but locked by the clear cut glass. As we lived, as I lived, a quarter of life ever since, life has gotten more of a taxi than a private vehicle. You take in people, you take them out, just as quick. We don't spend time understanding each other, stop for a moment and learn appreciating another. We do not get to know anymore.

When the path becomes narrower, do we tend to hinder or perpetuate?

I realized i came from a faraway place differing so much more, in terms of people, place and culture. Then we grow and differentiate, and i have become what i am today. I feel depreciative for those who do not appreciate differences. But i feel good, instance of quenching my questions on life exploration, just like the burp after a satisfying meal, knowing the difference. Slow i may be, but be it a treasure item. Being different is what makes us unique, isn't it? If one day, you feel trapped in the middle and can't be what's not, what should you do? Do as the Romans do or keep the old habit dies hard?

Boom Boom Pow~~

2009-09-06T15:33:00.002+08:00

One lucky weekend !!! ...Picking up one of the top 10 lucky prizes at Sentosa today, an event of Family Day and team building~ Made my willingness to wake up early on a Saturday morning worth!! Slept at 3am the previous night and eventually felt my Saturday was stoned @_@~... My price took its toll at the 6th placing of an external dvd burner~~ reminds me of teman-ing someone go shopping for a external line-in line-out I/O.. oh yeah.. it's for FYP, but ended up blasting music more than anything.

the lesboz chix

the sea, sun and sky

and the shades....totally, ain't it? :D

Then, we went for movies.

G-Force had me reminisce my furry balls which once conquered the lonely cages i ever have left now.. and they loved prickling human fingers, loved the corns and nuts, ever loving the long hot afternoon naps with sexy poses.. ^_^ gosh..

feeling eventful...it's entertaining ..the place and the ever people~

SCUBA AT SABAH NEXT UP! YOZ!

Listening to Gold 90.5FM

2009-08-30T22:04:00.006+08:00

Eeeeee...the sidebar is up..thought of reliving the old sidebar coz i'm lazy to do any further coding.. my blog is ugly coz i am lazy

Well, life is pretty comprehensive these days. So much so, everything needed to flow in at the same time. T_T give me break man!!! life, career, thinkings and pregnancy (not mine..hehe) but yeah..have been hiding at home for the past 2 weekends due to some nice weather.. and so crazy in love with oldies lately, addictive yet soothing recumbence. Wanted to disclose my recent fervent was to brood at home.

Yes, i do agree now that when we are selfish, decisions are easily made (quoted). Well, no, life is not meant to be selfish. Sadly, there goes.. I am so sorry to tell you that i am really not up to commitment yet, so i gotta do what i'm suppose to do. I feel really guilty for my negligence on commitment, but please forgive me. I am yet to be 24, so i am still young enough to reason my deflection. I promise i will cover my mistakes, my promises and my negligence all in one. It's not good. I am closing more doors, rather than attempting to open new doors often. I am scolding myself for loosing the humane viscosity. I swear I will not loose it out to this deluged world, but it's hard to hold on sometimes. Give me some space.

Then, life got lifted up to another level. I hope the two BIG decisions i made were right. It seems rational, but doesn't seems right to me....seems ordinary.. doesn't feel correct or certain. Yeahh.. life is always a mess by sudden interception and then come....all the undeciding factors.. *rants -- it's so unfair why am i always the deciding person??? this is leadership torture!!!

However, i do realized at the end of the tunnel, whether it's bright light or dark failure, things still roll on as it is. So why give yourself a hard time? Just give your best shot, and leave the rest to your boss (not god). Perhaps in life, if you wished to go on further, you have to leave some behind. It's the balance of the universe and it could not be helped of.

I will be shifting to a new place soon, a career advancement and puppies running around back home on the 18th September. Should i fly home just to catch a glimpse of those cute little mittens? I thought my diving event in September will be great, but this is even a greater event ..might be the greatest event of 2009! ^_^ Birth is the greatest creation of all.

Aaaahhhhhh....at one time it is one plain grain..at another, gives you enough pressure exhilaration to keep you awake and talk to a long time friend whole night long~

Aaaahhhhhhhh ...LIFE is to blog along. I have written a lot this weekend, the gush of satisfaction just fills. Happy Birthday Malaysia~~ I am definitely coming home one day.

Passion runs in your blood if you are able to discover it's type.

Another weekend in Singapore

2009-08-17T23:51:00.004+08:00

Hey ya you there!

How you do like my new skin? It's not finished, but i'm lazy to do any further development..let it be it for the mean time. Woot~ lots of space compared to the old skin ^_^

Tired days.. did some room cleaning recently, and found that my wardrobe has grown, and still is growing like nobody's business. Maybe the credit swapping has to stop at all means. I should REALLY stop shopping. The beautiful clothes out there will always meet its owners, which is not you..i mean, which is not me. I still need time to sort my 'one-bag-full-of-duno-wad". And, gotta give myself a tiny applause for doing some fine laundry and house chores during the weekend~

Weekends are always full of silly thinkings.. Weekdays would be full of hoping tomorrow is a saturday~ I need someone to whack me now and then. I'm getting blur at work. i'm waking later everyday to take off to work..PEople think i am a puny idiot, well, i don't mind. i'd rather keep quiet than enlighten you.. There are always transition periods, depends on good or bad ones.. *keep the jolly dude around me.

It's sad that Singapore plays HK movies dubbed in Mandarin. Heck, it really displeasures when you see your dear handsome hongkong boy's mouth miming mandarin out of a cantonese lip sync, not his voice, not the tone that you like..and worse of all, you barely understand if they used some difficult mandarin... it's the same as animes or jap movies dubbed in any other languages as well..imagine watching naruto in vietnamese. i'd rather the original language but an international subtitle like ..English?

Blog is the place for emotion overhauling.. and also to post things you are proud/shame of, or wanna show something that you're shy to disclaim...and NEVER think people don't read your stuff~

Things i could remember, i will remember.

Payday cheque all going to clear my credit bills tomorrow~~~

Night night~

State of my mind

2009-08-11T21:09:00.002+08:00

i wonder if we can control what we are thinking, translates to, what we want to think of. Rather than, all of it culminates into one peak of time, and on another hour, dispersed as a brush of the forehead. I think some are able to do it, controlling what to do, what to choose and even, what to think. If we can lay out clear cut structures in life, where does high and low comes by? Isn't it suffocating, always telling yourself what you should do, what you shan't, what you must, what you musn't? i don't know..some calls it discipline? proper? planning? i think i live outside this line, and never will abide to any .. but i do fairly admit, i always lay out a lot of things.. just that i'm kind of a failure to do it..

i remember reading somewhere that finding yourself is one of the hardest task in life. I'm still trying soul-searching...it really feels good, i feel different from the person i sit next to, talk to or with someone who has close similarities with me. Perhaps getting to know is really important.. i'm still looking around..maybe it's hard, i feel like giving up at times, but logic always tell me that's not logical...

On another note, i'm still waiting for an answer. It has been a month. Wish me luck? :)

Good sufficient rest always makes me another day of needing more and more rest :P

Late Sunday

2009-07-26T23:25:00.021+08:00

August 2009 is coming by, marks one year of working life in this big blue ocean. As a matter of having this middle-of-no-where feeling, life still goes on... and is all about spending money.. and cashing out at the end of the month for the high bills..

FOOD...

Chocolate Hazelnut Crunch

Ah well, the main course does not interest me much these days. Trying out weird sides and small stuff are the cravings.

Mango Pudding at Long Beach (dry ice decorated the bottom)

I for one, personally do not enjoy work lunch/dinner.. fully distressing trying to keep my table etiquette while performing work-related conversation.. in addition to all, keeping the non-locals interested on the table is quite an amount. In the end, I managed to surpass all distraught and eventually blend. One of the goodies the corporate world could offer, is nothing better than a free lunch. It was a challenge to balance between British, Germans, Japanese and Chinese. That's why Malaysian rocks! Taking a depth into, I wonder why there weren't any Singaporeans that night?

PLACES..

Heaven's Loft at 8th floor

It was a Sunday. It was the new opening of Orchard Central. It was a stroll after Ice Age 3. So why not? The live band at the mezzanine was jazzy and pretty cool.

The usual hangout - Crazy Elephant

Running around on Friday night, half drunk with Margarita Lime. I was tired oukay.

SHOPPING...

TopSHop/TOpMAn

The popular line-up at the new Louis Vuitton. No, there's no sales.

No, there's no sales in Swarovski either

How nice is Ion's toilet, that made me spend time to capture my preys

Yeah, all about ION ORCHARD now, it's the new fish in town. Shopping is about Singapore, Singapore has all about shopping...only... Maybe i should be grateful that this syndrome has grant me much immunity in retail procurement.. but sadly, i'm still far from "buying what's necessary".. hahaha.

TRAVEL

Booked a few flights home..which cost more than a bom

Thank you firefly for offering the 80-minute flight of Singapore-Ipoh. And thank you for closing your gates 30 minutes before time so that i have enough time to rush from Jurong or Aljunied all the way to Changi. Thank you also for the less affordable price in circumstance of the convenience weighed in.

.......

Talking about what realize those pictures above..and most of my time is spent on....

WORK

Happy Place after 6pm and those breaks in between

And some indulgence on..

MUSIC & LITERATURE

Lenka is pretty cool, she's Czech and Aussie mixed.

Still can't get enough of MJ's tunes too.

And radio is always the best choice for chinese songs, coz i duno which is which.

Reading the rusty old charm of Voltaire's Dictionary.

DREAM

Still the prime thing that i have always liked to do..be it snoozing or awake. I dream more than i can control myself from doing so..always drifting off too easily to be true.. and i hope dreams do come true. I believe it will someday... *floatz

My hopes are high at stakes. Is it truly the greener pasture? I believe so.. Let those staccati beat on.. Let's all hope and dream together ^_^

Gosh, it's 1 am and i'm still editing..gonna miss the 'taxi' tomorrow morning to work. Good night. Oyasuminasai. Gute nacht. Wan An.

P/S : It will not be a happy week as Malaysia's creative director, Yasmin Ahmad had just passed away. Days would gloom to mourn. I truly believe she had instilled a heart in each of us for all the work she did.

2009-07-18T00:33:00.007+08:00

It is those small spaces which kept real large stuff. It is those times when hours turned into seconds. It was the girl who sat still and read about the world. It was the musician who played the glass clanking melodies. The cameo played on. The audience had their time. Life shall end, love shall live on.

The Dance

2009-07-13T13:54:00.011+08:00

Consciousness expresses itself through creation.
This world we live in is the dance of the creator.
Dancers come and go in the twinkling of an eye but the dance lives on.
On many an occasion, when I am dancing, I have felt touched by something sacred.
In those moments, I felt my spirit soar and become one with everything that exists.
I become the stars and the moon.
I become the lover and the beloved.
I become the victor and the vanquished.
I become the master and the slave.
I become the singer and the song.
I become the knower and the known.
I keep on dancing and then, it is the eternal dance of creation.
The creator and the creation merge into one wholeness of joy.
I keep on dancing— until there is only. . .the dance.

Michael Jackson 1992

Well, yeah.. i was one of the kids who got scared by Thriller, thought that the guy really got killed in Smooth Criminal, knew about racial issues through Black and White, started to realise the earth is dying at our hands on Earth Song and, felt that You Are Not Alone was annoying due to its repetitive lyrics. Nevertheless, the legend lives on.

**My first purchase at HMV -- Michael Jackson live in Bucharest 1992, The Dangerous Tour. WHOPPING AWESOME.

The rhythm of the rain is the sound of silence

2009-07-06T20:45:00.004+08:00

I did not know the music stopped too soon to be thought of. I hesitated my waltz, and then, there was that. The dance was full of grace, a beautiful piece, the background notes as fragrant as the french pennies surging its summer blooms.. but it was unfinished, work undone.. As i watched his silhouette vanquished by the slamming doors, the notes still playing faintly behind..i just stared and did not wonder why.

If rain only poured on ye summer blue

Though thou knew it nay come true

The winds will coo to thee

The willows shall shake to see

Thus, listen carefully

Adulthood

2009-06-16T22:14:00.003+08:00

No play, no games. A life nine to five, else, more if required. I found another white shiny follicle sprouted upon the black ones today. #_# I haven't even turn 24, this is so unorthodox!!! Maybe i should not complain, i feel much more comfortable than many other engineers out there. I should be thankful, but no thanks to the white hair. I hope i missed, and hope that it's the previous one that's known to be sticking out to show 'intelligence'.

Today i shall prevail my thinking pads to only work efficiently at necessary times, not all the time.. But i can't help it!!! I like to think and think and dig thoughts, and sometimes, prolly, ponders too much too unhealthily. haha.

Maybe white sprouts are signs of growing up. And so are: transmuting from one gang happy bus rides to lonesome taxi rendezvous, from laugh and lunch to searching for the best food in town in that puny 1 hour that you have, getting from hiphop in the clubs to classical indulgement at the esplanade, yumchaz switched from 3am to 10pm and so on, so forth. Relationships getting bored, from play and fun to sophisticated dining at exclusive restaurants. Dates become lesser but each are more serious. Certainties became uncertain, sometimes, weekends felt longer than weekdays... Cooking taste better than food outside, ChannelNewsAsia seems much more interesting than Memoirs of Geisha playing at TV5. I think more than I sleep, I work more than I play, I worry more than I care. No it's not stress. It's just the transition of life.

Moving on seems pretty fast. Decisions are quick and mUst be right. Processors run to chase up to the latest technology. Sex is no longer a myth, boys are just guys. Pretense is strong, first impression paints the permanent picture, everything necessary is necessary, unnecessary is just insignificant and to be forgotten in a mili second. As if this huge world twirled so quick, before you knew it, it's another year, another decade, people start getting married, have kids and retire. Birthday celebrations are just protocols, a dine out is just a need to catch up with old friends. Too many uncountable problems surge, and people just don't talk about it anymore. I float and people don't understand why. Put up a charade, wear a mask, purse your lips and you are the drama queen. Truth to be entwined, hell to rule and the dark side reigns. Difficult became easy, good is bad, bad is good, all equals.

Where have you been, fun?

Yah. I have it, kept safely ^_^. What about yours?

Quotes of the summer June

2009-06-09T22:27:00.005+08:00

Wanna share some quotes to run the weekdays more efficiently:

German: Wie war der thor, wer weiser, wer bettler oder kaiser?

Translated: Who was the fool, Who was the wise man, the beggar or the king?

-the German chapter by D.C. Gilman of D.50-

from the book, Who Really Runs the World? by Thom Burnett & Alex Games

Latin: Jacta Alea Est!

Translated: The die is cast

-Julius Caesar-

Annotation : He had crossed the river, and there was no going back. He was at war with Pompey and the Senate of Rome.

Compose me a song

In your deluded self all night long

Why transcend me this heaven and hell

Instance of a fiery intensed spell

Watching me, watching you

Shall we begin this serenade in a cue..

-Lum Mi-Fern-

^_^

Is it the weather, or is it ME?

2009-06-02T21:50:00.011+08:00

The weather couldn't be hotter than this heat. It's very very darn super duper hot. It's not okay, although i know i'm as hot as the weather, or hotter still. Haha. It's serious when i get awaken by the heat in midnight. I NEVER wake up in midnights.

Another life's turning point after 8 months of working life. It's not healthy to count, though i do love to count and work out the math at times. I am being seconded to an industrial partner for the next 3 months ahead, walking along the roads of Geylang everyday with hot sun spiking heat on my purified skin. I really felt like i was in R&D for the first time (after a 8-month hide at the research institute, where everything seems so ideal, in actual f. stu. ideology). A part of me felt like being stricken by lightning, i knew it would happen one day, didn't thought it would be this fast, but it did came, BUZZED me. Well, the reluctance was some "graceful" friends back in SIMTech and nothing else of the unsound waves and ridiculous storms. It's time to learn how to solve problems. No. It's time to solve problems, not discuss problems, create problems, research on problems, sit down and think of problems, like a silly sit-duck, who never saw what outside of the panes offer. No time to loose, man. Yea, and i will be good in it, i know it.

I somehow, felt the green light deep within. I, too can feel slight guidance for this path less trodden. I don't know. I can't see, but i can just FEEL it. Just forward would be good, no turning back is even greater. Oh yeah..no regrets. I'm gonna build my career path in this dark R&D route, play facebook and still, communicate with computer languages and machines.

I have attended a scientific writing workshop recently, preaching on how to write a proper publication. In any circumstances, i didn't quite like the French head. I personally felt he wasn't that good, but just good enough to bluff some bucks out of the Singaporeans kiasu mindsets. While, the other was a software training...again..some scientist bullz shooting the poor technical personnel with their so-called "your software not good enough for us" subversive concrete ascendance. When will only people start to communicate efficiently? Without any sort of discrimination, with substantial point of view, steadfast as ground rooted? I don't prefer improper communication and i don't like mandarin. Hell ya. Do you call yourself an engineer/scientist while you can't even propagate the universal language in the rightful accordance? Helluva bull. Okay, maybe i'm going a bit far here...personally feels, all bores down to the mind itself. It's a great organ, depends on how you use it.

I'm writing this longer coz i know you are enjoying this. muahaha. let's continue.

I went to Aquarama (fish fair), a book fair..and did window shopping on some musical ornaments. Wahhhh..seems all three events is relatively back to the good old secondary school days, where i had fishes, had time for my fave literatures and played a piano back then. Looking at the fighting fishes, brought me back to memories where we used to sell them at our school fair..and friends were friends back then, hell yeah. Sad to say, i'm having a hard time juggling reading as eyes just get pretty fatigue at the end of the day usually, and what more laziness surges like a waterpipe burst.. bleah..And as for piano..just remembered that i didn't had good money to support myself to further into it, so i was just lost in music somewhere, transmuted from a composer to a listener. My current passion are just being with good friends..and do one or two outdoors at times (can't afford too many of it anymore..old d..haha)..and have some good time dwelling in some thoughts. In short, just having a good time worth more than gold seriously. During the weekend, i discovered some new personalities, which..where..things are always ironic..aren't they. hatelove. lovehate. which comes first? hate? love? hahaha...

and i'll just write and write...

ah! not forgetting..managed to grasp a Shakespeare's full works for only $9.90 at the book fair!! It's a whooping bargain..comparatively, as i read damn slow (or might not finish ever) ..libraries won't love a borrower like me. Bah. Now i can read as slow as i want, get my wildest imaginations on the quirkiest old golden English. Words are my life. Beautiful words are even more inspirational. BUT, i'm still lazy to start on that fat book, Shakespeare on the cover staring at me like my great-grandfather wall masterpiece.

It feels good to write a lot. Write and write..like hell who cares what in the world is transcending along.. I like my time, i like the words. It just brings me forth, forge me a fortress when i feel fatigue. They never leave me, keeps imprinting and grinds me deep.

The night will never get lonely.

2009-05-18T23:44:00.003+08:00

It's a bit late now, feeling tired out of the Monday routine. It seems life would be a little better above clouds, above serenity and passion...where nothing substitutes nothing, or nothing can ever substitute something. Well, simple as it is, i'm glad that my dear friends still read this old dusty blog i have had..for like few years. I wonder how long i could keep the pace..writing is almost inevitable.

Time, place and people shall coincide, and wind up to be a dream. I'm out of luck, doesn't seem to get the coincidence too often, well, at the usual, time will just walk me by..so so sad eh. Oh well.. Why people chase over their dreams? where we can have them so clearly once we doze off into slumberland.. or perhaps their pillow just ain't soft as mine. It's not difficult to have a dream. It's difficult to write your dream. When you write them, you need the right words and rhythm. But damn..it's frustrating when most people can't see what you saw and can't read what you wrote, even with the right elements.

Although i might not have the all three, but i should write them out one by one. I shall write my dreams though it's tough. I know i should. Nowadays, i feel so layered as if dreams were no longer there, yet i know it's there. My words became meaningless yet meaningful. But, who would be the one who will read what i write...and see what i saw?

I'm getting too deep, oh no, i can't save myself...as if i'm drowning into the deep dirty dark sea... Thanks to the shallowness I've been through that brought me this path of the depth. It's not good..you don't find one or two easily in such depth. I really hope i'm doing the right thing...well, since ever..i'm much more confident in making decisions for myself, i feel so invisible to problems. It's there, but i just don't care.

Just not good enough yet. I felt like going home today, so i wen't and bought myself a bus ticket.

Reading Jean Jacques-Rousseau : The Social Contract. Very very nice WORDS indeed, which have been always be with me..

2009-05-05T20:40:00.004+08:00

i always have lots to do. but i always don't do the lots of stuff that's needed to be done. It feels great, to take one day off from work.. totally not doing anything, brain emptied.. (okay..a tiny confession that i did peep at the office mailbox.. BUT it was for a personal communication.. :P okay! i did replied some of my colleagues..they sounded urgent :) )

Labour day's weekend was superb with the old uni gang again..i love the pics taken..it's just some real good ol' days revamp!..after school rock..everyone more proper and matured after being in the working world for almost 1 year..i do admit, we did change for the better sake.. all of us, in our own different ways...and let's say fate was so 'helpful' to let me bump into my past in the midst of hype and everything..i knew it, a past will just stay as a dream..

I would really wanna say... i wanna work my ass off coz i love my job.. it sounds so not me.. haha..or probably it's really me..this kinda spirit would spoils the whole employee market completely..making it more competitive each day.. and what most, i found inspiration and passion in my job and that's really cool.. it's ironic that i can't wait to be back at work!

It really feels great. Not doing anything. No thinking of any stuff. But you know...the waves will somehow come, and when it's time, you'll just succumb naturally. Till the time comes..good vibes, great feelings..and speak no more of the future.

Every once in a while

2009-04-19T21:30:00.006+08:00

If your place is not raining, you would have a hunch about global warming. The city is red tonight, another signs of environmental killing..

Deep was the word, which kept me afloat at some early hours. I wondered how deep i could go, thus, i went signing up for scuba. Today was my first confined pool diving experience. Yes. Valuable. Once in a life time. and yes. Deep, very deep. It drained almost every litre out of me for the continuous 10-5pm session. I went deep (not as deep as the ocean yet, but gonna do it real soon!), met someone deep, and unpredictably discovered a hidden phobia and overcame it!

I have mentioned several times of 'afloat' just figuratively..but literally..this was for real..i wasn't touching land, neither any gravity defined platforms.. just my oxygen tank and i..being able to travel down there is just truly amazing.. wait till i get to the ocean..swim along with their fins, flip as they whirled and observe the world's most less explored lands..

How deep can you go? Is depth an obstacle..or a target to surpass? either just a mathematical distance to you or a place you've never been there before?

Many or most of us have THIS -- World Of Our Own..

SOME has yet to discover it, or has never discovered it before.. until they do, they'll go.."woohoo" or "cuckoo"..
SOME keeps it safe at their hearts and do soul-searchings now and then..
SOME wears masks and pretend to go along with the world, has little time for their own world, leaving that place abandoned and next to none.
SOME tend to pour all at their personal blogs, thinking no-one-reads-my-stuff..but actually..people do READ..
SOME lives in it only at a certain percentage, especially when they are alone..for instance "hobby of dressing up as a victorian opera singer and sings to oneself in front of mirror holding the hair-dryer" and masters a switching ability between reality and own..

well..on the other greener or darker side of the grass..

SOME lives in it all-day.. all-nite.. all of their lives.. they only have one perspective... held tightly to one and beholding none any other worlds. but they know it's a big big world outside there.. choosing ignorance, which leads to bliss after all.
SOME has no reality, no acceptance..the world of their own is the only world they have. that's it. period.

This is no bullshit, of many people encounters, acquaintances, frienships, BFFs till enemies.. there are MORE SOME out there..which..makes the world scarier, dark, intriguing or MigHt bE BeTTEr fRom TimE to tIMe..

Maybe it's like..i never knew taking off my mask underwater was that challenging..till i did it. Got a dead duck for it..but eventually..all well ends well..

I love the world of my own ^_^. I don't really like reality but there isn't a choice to run away. You still have to learn how to take off your mask underwater though, it's tough, difficult..but not necessary you can't do it. Human always fumble when there are choices..when they ain't happy, they have pointy fingers at the crossroad they once stood at, therefore, when there isn't choice, i would say sometimes it's a better thang.. we save the thinking and let fate lead us where it should be.. and we can't really blame fate, can we? Coz..we can't choose our fate either..

i was glad that i carried my life support, that heavy oxygen tank behind me, did stunts which i thought i can't, enjoyed the route under the hot burning sun which gave me sexy bikini sunburns.. and next to millions..seeing ocean life in real time! deep down under!

Friends -- party, laugh, study, think, talk, work, sleep and nua like there's no other day..no problems, no worries..

as a problem is not a problem if there's no solution. So why worry since there's a solution for retrieval. A question not necessary have answer or answers.. *quoted by you. U U U. hang pig ^Oo^

A very good week to start on with two ultimately important huge presentation with big bosses. Do you LoVe R&D? yoz. Nite.

2009 blues

2009-04-06T21:03:00.007+08:00

It's not a good month.

Some broke up.

Some had a surgical operation.

Some is having a hideous time at work.

Some lost his thumb drive with super confidential information in it.

Some lost a job.

Some actually don't mean it.

Some had cancer.

If you are complaining about how much your boss tortures you, or the dinner was just ain't respectively up to standard, please shut up and start thanking your day. Life is only one short time, given or taken, it's how you fill up the jar. I'm always trying to convince that bad things happen in due course of good stuff. So that, the bright light is always at the end of the tunnel, in your thoughts, least it could happen, there's hope, which is important to strengthen out lifespan.

On another note, do you think I could make it there?

Otherwise, thank you.

CNY 2009 dinner at Boon Lay Raja Restaurant

Beautiful Aye..@NIE library

salt water

my table..6th april 2009, Holiday Atrium

8pm at the suburbs of Changi

cables..

Star-phish and sea cucumber

2009-03-25T22:47:00.008+08:00

Well, wanna note this down before today turns into history.. or perhaps everything now had a sudden shift of present to past, and what's future might be becoming present. imagination or for real..sigh..

There's this wise lil cute sea cucumber who likes to nua at some rock and a spiky starfish which spikes whatever that comes around. The sea cucumber is easily baited by the starfish but yet to be victimized as..well, lil sea cucumber is wise ma. Starfish thinks sea cucumber is more like a fish since it succumbs to baits easily. They live happily under the shallow waters of Redang island well shaded with the large coconut tree leaves. Sea cucumber likes to crawl around and scares starfish..if only starfish could whack it and cast some magical spell on it to turn it into something uglier.. ah ..starfish has a dream to transform into a beautiful seahorse which is so sophisticatedly admired by many in the underwater world..or maybe a sotong to squirt black ink and kill dee annoying sea cucumber ;)

Beauty amidst of hustle bustle

Perhaps again, a dream will always be a dream, and sweet dreams are better more than less, ain't it?

Just made one of my day with THIS amidst of some mid week routines~ Who doesn't want to lie on the rock whole day looking out to the sun smiling brightly on you and listen to soothing waves hitting the shores..i wonder when will the sail change its course...

if only life is that simple.

Reasons

2009-03-16T22:42:00.003+08:00

In this life, we always have too profound reasons. Reasons which gifted us this utmost power to abruptly halt and retract from our decision and what we're facing. It's not easy to be out of our comfort zone, stepping over to something new for a breakthrough..choosing the path less taken, taking risk like never before. But where do we find those small little courage in us? where discouragement swarms beneath too buzzing to ignore. We find endless rituals to cast us out of the curse, whilst, telling ourselves lies, reasons to believe that the belief is true. But again, there is a contradicting negative force will push you awayyy from the 'correct' direction, leading you into something different, afresh, different and awkward. The small little courage does magic to change the course, as what we are today, heals your regrets and let you have reasons to go on. Back to back, they are reasons.

If you can give reasons for yourself NOT TO, why not give yourself a reason TO DO?

Simplicity is gone. The calm only happens after a storm. Stop telling lies to yourself. Stop asking what, why, how but try to execute them. The reality is that what you chose. Dare to dream for your reality to exist. Some day we will know not all things could be carried aboard, only important things.. and things you have gave important thoughts all these while were actually redundant.

2009-03-14T20:17:00.002+08:00

Event done ^_^ Happie~~

Wee. Sweet. *shy

Thank you.

2009-03-05T20:20:00.004+08:00

At this juncture, where your work had spun u around pretty too much, till you're too immune to feel any else additional pressure, it seems lifeless though you have THIS MegaPascal on your shoulders. I have this this this this this...but no no no no no TIME. What the heck did all the events saturate on one fine week?

You have been ill, but you are NOT on MC,

you are still going to office like no man's business,

participating in the company annual run(amazing to be in top final list *shudder),

annual dinner at the Holiday Inn Atrium....

trying to weigh an equilateral of administration,

organizing your department's retreat session (just told to be co-mc *o*),

stuck your ass into invited talks and 'purposeful' meetings,

impromptu presentations,

site visits,

plus your most honorable research findings which your boss harp on you in due course of a paper publication famine...

above all, you need to put up a sweet face whenever you meet people..

that was all on the right side. On the left side, i have insurance to deal with, study for my diving, plan my further studies, on and off juggle with some weekend getaway, HOUSE CHORES WHICH I FUCKING HATE MUCH...and pretty maintain my social network...

BAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....

going crazy, mad, insane, talking to myself, pulling hair, throwing things around, shout, wrangle, cursing like ... i'm loosing words, loosing sanity, loosing life

where is the time for me and myself has gone? huhu. gotta pack for annual dinner...

2009-02-25T17:36:00.003+08:00

Out of gas to work today...feeling really sucky.. most probably VERY lack of sleep. Although i know that i'm in hot soup..but still no mood to work. Some days i just killed it like that. Tired of every other things i'm helpless of...yet sometimes exhumed about certain things i can do here.. mood is every puny stuff of me~ if only the art of ignorance can be mastered, how i wished.

guy-i-see-in-bus-stop-every-wednesday-after-school

2009-02-21T23:31:00.004+08:00

It was a tired week. Finally getting most questions some answers, but not truly AN answer yet. Not looking forward to monday, but it always comes greeting you with shit loads of stuff. Blasting. I just got an interesting news of guy-i-see-in-bus-stop-every-wednesday-after-school. Back dating would be lost in numbers, but i all i could say is... "wow". It's weird that i still remember clearly who is he, but things which happened back then were totally erased, and that's called "vividly". Old slump days...haha...but it's nice to know and chew on some good ol' news from time to time.

Yikes. i've been on too much chore that my arse hurts =.=" yes it's this bad, i wished i could pay for a sexy hot italian guy butt masseur and sipping sex on the beach side to side... and yup, i'm grown up and i cook..and i usually spend ONE BLOODY DAY to clean up the mess of my tiny room proportionally every week. what more to say, even lazier to step out of the zone and rather do things by the one-click-away kinda activity. Hurting arse became lazy bum.

Seems like work sounds a little more interesting these days.. at least it's starting to be manageable and adapting quite well to shutting off the shiat and work like a peasant. Looking forward to my company dinner and the closing financial year for some goodies though ^_^ Before long..plenty of task committed to work on. Gambatte ne!!!

Last time i used to have this list long of stuff i really wanna do, if you'd asked me now, what i really wanna do is just NOTHING. My phone bill just hikes but i don't mind as calls are just necessary to reach good friends nowadays. I find it so unfit when people around can't really understand my style. YOU don't need to understand. YOU just need to click. Well...years ago..there's this sweet person telling me how we clicked and bring it on till now..i've not spoke to her for some time but i would like to wish her best in her life. Whilst, some just like to sudden miss call you in the midst of "pulling hair" session...and i just laughed..Some pulak likes to call up to complain and extrapolate complains like the world is coming to an end, but by the time we knew, we were just laughing problems away..

There are still many unlisted significant ones, where each of them are treasures to me. These are things money can't buy and time can't restore... makes me worthwhile and get going regardless of rain and shine...

Dog fell sick few days ago almost gave me a heart attack o_O but finally getting better...Life is about ups and downs..seems like working has caught a lot of nerves in most of us..try some relieve, getaway and a strong mind helps...let mind control work..not work control you..

stressed is desserts. happy working friends ^_^

Pictura

2009-02-07T16:13:00.002+08:00

Where did all it went? All stucked and kept in each portrait we'd ever digitally painted. Every picture had a story, had a hidden story and there were much laughter. When life is dry and snoozy, you replay all those, as if they were tapes, yes they are tapes. The videos came alive rewinding and started running in your head again. You are looking at your computer screen but your vision is all about those live videos. You saw your thin self and looked down at your current belly..all those care free days seemingly over, gone. Yet..it keeps running, repetitively..

To keep us on pace, we need to run a deluge, fall down real hard, get up with all bruise and continue running..always grumbling where is the end line. Only when i reached the end, i felt like starting the race all over again. But not possible. Other stuff are calling upon. Responsibilities.

Memory has a capability of putting a full stop at that exact location you left a while ago. You can revise each word but nothing after the dot. After forty years, maybe.. when we see each other again..with much changes, we will continue to write on that sentence after that full stop memory put us at. There will never be blanks in the sentence, only new words, lines, paragraph or as huge as a 5000 words essay..written at the other side of the story. In the end, we still start from where we stopped. It's reunion.

One night at Geylang~

2009-01-10T15:01:00.014+08:00

Didn't know where did this came about..but after we attended a colleague's self-introductory presentation about his whereabouts, we decided to scrutinize the red light area of singapore for.......

one night at GeyLaNg~

on the backseat with jasz yo

Thanks to the driver who knew a lot of stuff about geylang..and of reference to ieat-ishoot-ipost, we had three choices initially, all located at the red wild streets or what they called as lorongs which were:

Frog leg porridge
126 dimsum
kuay chap (pork's stuff)

Jeng jeng jeng...so we've come to a democratic decision of heading for the decided dish~ also..in concern of one party member which eventually had sore throat but still displayed a great image with food..

jalan jalan cari makan program mc : Hock (the green hulk)

WARGH *salivate

As i kept forgetting that they are Singaporeans..indeed they won't get stuff like sedap giler, sekaligus bayar, kantoi, mampus... but can't seem to get those out of my lines (shows that i'm truly a MALAYSIAN *winks..proud to be one~~~) and i'm eventually easily influenced into jialat, walao eh, si mi tai chi(what's the big problem?).. well..things aren't that bad..they do try to blend some like trying to use zha dao in some circumstances, sadly...still not good at it!!! while i'm trying to use word like fierce which means extremely hardworking against ppl who OT..whahahah..always me using on others, no one using it on me..so u would predict the outcome of my February appraisal results.................... *o*

shucks. back to food and geylang.

fried chee cheong fun

For me, i think the highlight of the day would be the fried chee cheong fun..taste damn kao MSG(Monosodium Glutamate)..but texture is wow wow~~ there's this fried tai chi(scallop) which taste pretty delicious and oily as well!!! the drinks are as you could see..as huge enough to quench your thirst for the MSG, oily food and as well as talking too much upfront :D

ohya~ 126 actually means wan dou sek (found food) at Block 126. We were lucky to have found the shop minutes after turning into the province, but got stuck finding car park as the night was drawing in, and people too as well into the busy streets. I was informatively told that this is one of the oldest part of singapore, of course, its proud central logistics with races of chinese and malays residing in the early years. It was a bit not so likely of Penang. (If i said it was LIKELY, might get some bruises and punches from my dearest Penangites acquaintances~) Again, i was informatively told again..by the one that knew Geylang well..that if you needed some extra services, it could be easily found on the even numbered streets, where as the odd numbered streets are usually 'clean'. Not so sure about this fact though, just simply quoting..

Okay..moving on.

Walked for 9 roads (hang kau tiu kai) to locate this soya bean shop. Can you believe it's a corner lot!!! and literally..it can survive such big production and sales by just selling soya bean... =.="" it's called YONG HE soya bean located at Lorong 9A..

then some guy..very proud ordered some special salty soya bean T_T for a change.

RoY : pointing to the special item on menu.

(the guy that always get crossed with the order taking aunty)

Chi Wai : the fierce guy (always OT)

Salty soya bean @.@ =.=" #.#.....

Aunty: Ni bu huey chi de la! Shi taiwan ren chai huey chi de~

(you don't know how to eat..only taiwanese does)

RoY: *insisting face

Aunty: *Sharp stare and left to place our orders

My one and only bean curd order on table~

and salty soya bean's fritters~

The taste of salty soya bean : YUCKS!!! Taste totally like very very salty porridge!!! Maybe it's better for breakfast..but not for dessert/supper.. i chose the default bean curd..texture okay, but no taste.. O.O.. still the ipoh bean curd is the best in the universe~~ Others ordered soya bean and went with fried fritters (yiu tiao or yao char kwai). In fact, i tried that some place else, and fritters really goes damn well with soya bean!!! Jasz was enthu about soyz, so eventually bought 6 packets home for her family~

Well, happy times ARE ALWAYS fast~ so that was that and everyone went back to home sweet home in the end..the gang picture got a bit blurred so dun intend to put it here..

in appreciation..

Captain Ahmad : Jon (also the guy who knew Geylang)

Camera-gal : Jasz

May 2009 will be a good one! New year resolution have a lot..but a bit lazy to list it here anymore..maybe in next post~ getting sleepy with long post like this on hot saturday afternoon..

GOLDEN OX, here it comes!!!

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR PEOPLE!!!

GONG XI GONG XI!!!

time to give instead of receiving...

2008-12-29T17:52:00.003+08:00

So the whole heap of 2008 is gonna end soon, will the next still soar, stagnant, or be low-life? No mood to work today totally..so finally found my ranting channel here. Facebook-ing almost the whole day, trying to munch down some papers, but eventually fell to my beloved sweet arms on desktop and snoozed off being unnoticeable. Commenting on 'people standing too far apart in pictures' kinda lit on my day. Hehe. Ofcos i sound free, but i don't. There's a mountain high of task waiting dearly for me to settle on, but i hesitated, why oh why? It's a rainy day and holidays in Malaysia plus it's the day of the month...and one damn kepo fella always keep asking me so many stupid questions in office........i hope i could give him that 'red-arrowed' stare to kill him off at that instance...how could some1 be so annoying and not notice it himself...gawd..so that says it all. Not really interested in 2009, perhaps, just hoping for the best as i could smell the no-fun workload odour. But holidays still comes running by once a while to offer some getaway to scurry off from reality...

okla..got lengchai ask to go back together liao..babai..~~ :D

another day w/o working properly............

Introducing A*STAR

2008-12-20T15:41:00.018+08:00

Hie. Indeed, this was my first time at the A*STAR (Agency Science, Technology and Research) headquarters consisting of A*STAR HQ, Biopolis and Fusionopolis at Buona Vista. Also, this was my first training offered by SIMTech. The place was awesomely great, so, i thought a share of thinker is kinda refreshing here.

Very brief, A*STAR is a governmental agency in research of latest science and technology : Engineering, Biomedical, Aerospace, Biotechnology, etc. There are approximately 12 RIs (Research Institute) comprising of different research areas spread all over Singapore. One mission of unity, all RIs shall be relocated at one coordinate, and yes, researchers like us do benefit on our new facilities.

A*STAR Headquarters building (could be seen directly from the Buona Vista MRT)

On the precedence to reach the venue, the sight of view would be rather high profile with expatriates and locals walking around at a professional pace. Cars and taxi are at a minimum size and the light throttle of shuttle buses could be a coherence all in all.

Training details :

Time : 9.00am - 5.00pm

Date : 15th and 16th December 2008

Venue : Level 5 -- The Matrix, Biopolis

Title : Effective Presentation Skills

Biopolis brick road

The uphill schematic was rather intriguing under the wet weather. Feeling very christmassy as i descended down due to slight decorations all way along.

SIMTech has been arranged to join this environment in Fusionopolis Phase II in two years time. Up till now, only Phase I has been completed and recently opened 2 months ago. I also did witnessed the platform of Phase II has been concurrently flat, and functions as a temporary car park. I guess 2 years down the road is not too promising after all?

Garden in the midst of business and technicality.

For meal breaks, it's not anymore monotonous food courts available in the vicinity. For my choice of lunch, i would rather pack and sit under the superb rain tree facing the luscious fish pond. In terms of second priorities, there are cafes and restaurants (eg: O'Brien, local namely ones, etc) amidst. Well, of course quality comes with a price as well.

Sky bridges are one of the highlights of their majestic features.

Coincidently, these links are located at the same level of our training room, so we could have a great view and feel about how's it like to be up there! Not forgetting the views upfront from that level itself are breath-taking too!

Great architecture, field of view and facilities : RFID lifts and auto flush for toilets. One thing lack is probably the safety for unknown virus carried out for research at these building. The last thing we want is an unexpected biological warfare in Singapore. I wonder if I would quit the old school habit at NTU (where food is cheap and a core of libraries to suffice) and adapt into the new environment likewise. Changes of life, trading campus jay-walking with corporate stylo?

i wonder where this road will lead me to

As things emerged one by one

Instance of guiding torches

To proceed beyond the dark and unseen

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

WISHING ALL A GREAT BULK YEAR AHEAD IN 2009!

The Tao Te Ching // Lao-tzu, translated by Stephen Mitchell

2008-12-02T20:51:00.000+08:00

27.

A good traveler has no fixed plans
and is not intent upon arriving.
A good artist lets his intuition
lead him whereever it wants.
A good scientist has freed himself of concepts
and keeps his mind open to what is.

Thus the Master is available to all people
and doesn't reject anyone.
He is ready to use all situations
and doesn't waste anything.
This is called embodying the light.

What is a good man but a bad man's teacher?
What is a bad man but a good man's job?
If you don't understand this, you will get lost,
however intelligent you are.
It is the great secret.

2008-11-30T00:20:00.003+08:00

Tonight i'm glad to know that i'm not the only one who is holding back the past. I begin to understand, why my dad would just sit reminiscing in front of his hi-fi playing some old songs. Coz i might be doing it soon, quite often, to archive ALL OF IT and put it in an invulnerable place.

Maxime's (French attach student) farewell at Turf City. *expensive seafood at AH YAT

Arhhhhh...life should be more than a nerve-wrecking job. I like it in a way, but i don't like it when it tries to take my life away. So we conform and try live out of it as much as possible. No much choices as engineers are made to troubleshoot, the frontline of problems, headache and suck up all the flow disturbances. I pray to build my course, to climb the high ladder..what is research when everyone knows everything already?

Scrabble competition WINNER team! (office games)

It has been 6 months (wow..that's like half a year) out of school and 3 months in SIMTech A*STAR. There are people asking me to settle here, but i have a whole lot of doubts. Most probably when 2 years come about, i will know what's what. and that's that. Just currently, doing what's necessary and worry later~

Saturday night, not out at the bar, or with anyone nearby me, just archiving. I love every bit of my old times. Every tiny weeny bit of it, be it happy, sad, sweet, sour..

The smile that sprinkled spring

Blossomed into laughter and poignance

Getting SLOWER....

2008-11-17T22:42:00.006+08:00

Looking forward to something tend to keep me afloat at times, when I feel needy to get out of the cage. Cage == working life~~ I am lucky enough that till now, i still maintain work flow without OT, but i think my pace is getting slower and slower. Why?? Increasing activities during and after working hours -.-" Time seems so constrained to activate the OT syndrome.... or probably just 'duncare-lah' to have good work performance..no motivation, no heart~

Office socialism vs work, which is which?!

There's a lot of enthusiasts (nice way of calling workaholics) around me, which kinda creates a big dark shadow on ME, unless i on the tiny lamp to light up a little.

25% promo for a new sushi place at Marina Sq till the end of Nov (forgot name, but shop is opposite gloria jeans and near Hot Pot steamboat and Secret Recipe)

Every time badminton after work keeps me as beefy bright *_* during the nights..for instance, TONIGHT. It's nice to loosen my tight stressed up muscles, but makes me misses tkd damn lots~~Anyhow, time runs like a cold bad flu. Can't believe i really invested my time and interest during those days..now i dun even have a heart to put up a good fight at the court..whahaha~~

Sex on the Beach of Arizona? The band was breath-taking!

Further studies or join the industry??? Either way i am so bad at it. At a cross road to realize things for myself...and telling myself over and over again to TOUR SINGAPORE MORE. I'm getting so darn lazy, i even lost interest in traveling, adventure, sports, bla bla..just wanna stay in my bed like..forever.. what has come to me?? okay..i still go some places..but the pace is also slowing down. and i wonder will europe be successful in a year or two~

Slowing down is not all bad as you could feel/see and enjoy things that some people are unable to. Upon a slip of time, i might even think my decisions through..I have also slowed down and managed to meet some impossible people in my life which is so so so important to me up till now.. it felt just the same as the first day we met back then. I don't know what the air is playing, but again..the running flu (as in time) even got worse that..time just slipped as work and some fun shoppy sheared it off..just so easily... oh yeah yeah~~ got myself a downshifter nike and really luv it though it's a plus one in size!!~

I guess time won't slow down, the world won't either. It's just me..trying to pierce into what i feel most important in my life...where some may think it's bullshit, i might just happily carry the gold away.... People should learn to love imperfection, they are lovely and unchangeable just as where they belong to be~~ you have to loveee meeee coz i'm MANDARIN IMPAIRED OK!

Will the change do you?

2008-11-06T09:48:00.003+08:00

5th Nov 2008: Obama Barack is Mr President of the United States of America.

"Change the world for a better place".

One key word of almost EVERY politician would be CHANGE. Easier said than done. Now that he has two middle-east wars, a nuclear situation and a heap of economic mess to clean up, do you think he is up for those? Besides, he wants the best for the welfare of Americans in terms of health, home and future. These promises are too ideal to be true. Yes, a change would be good, but, for everything in 4 years by the Democrats? It's ambitious.

We always have so much in mind, the list and everything we wanted to do. But how many did we successfully accomplished? Everytime we write down, we feel confident, motivated, that is thus, we are still jotting or it's just a mindful ambition. Well, i do not mean Mr. President is a NATO (No Action Talk Only), rather, just take a look down the road and observe, and too, learn. I urge people to be realistic enough to differentiate words and action. The world is misleading enough by propaganda, the root of words. As always, disappointment always sets in at the end of the day. Yes, we do love to live in dreams, as they are perfectly perceived, and things work how we desired it to be. But in reality, THERE IS NO SUCH THING. Bear in mind that to be cautious is to safeguard ourselves and not anybody, in short, think before believing.

Dreams are sweet to live by, but everyday as the sun rises, we know it's reality but yet deny, and rather believed in fallacy.

Early morning

2008-10-19T02:03:00.013+08:00

The usual wee hour expenditure which could afford some headache tomorrow and eye-bags for the rest of the week. No more denial, i love the wee as always~~ I really wanna share this, though it might not be very very very special, but it's one damn awesome dessert! Wanna write before i get lazy. Though, not trying to be another version of hungrygowhere either..

attention: chocolate lovers...introducing~~~~

~*WALNUT ROCKY ROAD*~

from..

Earle Swensen's Grill : Salad : Ice Cream

After doing some math on it..we've discovered 6 types of real fattening high calorie substances, blah blah.. in it, the (1)choc chips (2)chopped walnut (3)mud cake (4)peanut butter sauce (5)choco sauce (6) and last but not least, the significant Swensen chocolate ice-cream.

It comes along with a hot pan when served..and the both sauces, chips and nuts are simmered onto ice-cream and mud cake~~ so it's like frying all those 5 items, thus the ice-cream melts down...you could check out the bubbly effect, looks damn tasty..one good highlight is the melted (7)marshmallows..OOPS! that makes it the seventh fattening item on the list...the spoiler is the part, where after it cooled down, and it's actually kinda ugly..muahhhaa..

Oh yeah..and it was at..

We, as in 2 person..spent 1 hour++ trying to finish the whole damn pot. One of a worthy piece if you were up to some long hours chatty sessions. Place wise, the lights are kinda cute. As for the main meal, we had lobsters, salad and soup. It was above average, but not at the level of suitable to be recommended, so i'd rather put the dessert in priority.

Changi T3 (taken in the skytrain) - great clouds

Yes? Wondering why i travelled such distance for some indulgence? For some reasons, some places can't be avoided :D

Nice weekend..but still tired..need lots and lots of brain emptying session at home...and prayyyyy...do i really need to badminton on Monday after work for the sake of office socialism??!

*~Life is hard if there is no good ice-cream*~

One part of me and another

2008-10-12T20:38:00.006+08:00

Sunday night..being very spaciously isolated at the apartment, a part of me, feeling reluctant to get back to work, another part, anxiously anticipating the monday sun. There was quite an eventful weeks i had dated back from my previous post till now, for instance, meeting new people and projects big-time at office. I kept a lot of things to babble back then, but turned out, blank when i eventually logged on.

I don't feel much exclamation recently, probably work has gotten somehow serious. To get a rewind:

floor mat of the city

I went for a stroll at Orchard yesterday to grab a wallet and realized the city is really all about labels (or am i just lame?). I watched Carrie Bradshaw shopping at PRADA the other night, and boom! the next, moment, i was at PRADA, checking out a demonic diamond heels at $600. Then i went over to LV, Gucci, Coach, Salvatore Ferragamore, F C U K..and etc. How could people afford all these?? and what i saw was these places were swarmed with people, even lining up to get into LV??! As, other more affordable brand were nonetheless bothered much. The literature section at Kinokuniya of Takashimaya practically took my breath away. Long i had dreamt to see my favourite authors' works to be so so complete. Good work for the city. On the way home, i witnessed some ferrari lined at par with my SBS. haha.

So that was how one saturday in singapore went. All much dwelled into desires, and originally starting to feel less fit and reminisced the jungle/beaches i'd spent during the student days. Am i not a city gal after all and kept wanting to go back, and back. Or perhaps, the city is way too small for me. I really wish to go somewhere according to the popular lines of "LONDON, PARIS, NEW YORK". I want to see what's the other side about. Is it all about that too? Again, one part has doubts to hold back and the other, totally all out for it.

accidental vandalism

Maybe things are just pretty simple. If you want this, you gotta do this, this and this. It's just the checklist. I've been planning my "what's next" checklist and really doing a lot of thinking. I wanna keep things the simplest as it is. Girls tend to think too much. Let nature takes it's precedence~

Looks like another weekend has passed just not too much and ain't nothing at all either. Monday will be a great one, swim in, projects.

2008-09-23T20:17:00.003+08:00

Slew slack, totally.

I sensed the watchful eyes surround me, all of a sudden, today seems rather strong at strength. The brick of pessimism hit me hard. I hate to believe my senses, but it never fails me. I should put some effort in my work. Spiritless, blinded by the word of direction...as if spring left, and here came grayscale winter. The winds are gigantic, branches shook and the colours fading..just wondering which step is the best to proceed.. and not leave condemnation around.

I know what i need:

(1) Direction,

(2) Concentration,

(3)Initiative,

(4) A clear mind,

(5)... SO MANY THINGS!!!

.....................

I think i need a lot of things..which turn out that, I myself is unsure what I'm supposed to do.. Can i at least label this as a syndrome.. it's another new phase of life and not so sure anymore i could handle it well. I don't see what is going around, worried to be out of sight, and it just wont get out of mind.

Sway..

Evening Serenade

2008-09-21T21:32:00.005+08:00

Introducing the one that sleeps by my side every night :D

maccie

itouch

irear

inet

Simplicity is what i want, Apple is what i desire~

2008-09-11T16:51:00.005+08:00

As usual, get postings done in dee office. GOod habit to release tension and stress~~~

Just submitted my due at 4pm, so, i'm taking a 5 here. In fact, i do take alot of 5s.. :P though it's only 5pm, tummy's grouchy already due to early lunch. I got myself a lamington burger (well just beef and bacons altogether with bread and chips) which tasted real good! too bad no pic..the minced beef part in the meat was totally slashing! I wonder if i should call Karen for meals any soon as she's a 8 years of physio lecturing over at NIE, so i bet she least she knows what's tasty better than me around here..She's like the 2nd Portuguese i've known in my entire life, and speaks totally aussie =.= goodd daeeee..cheers to the western here hoo hoo..and try to avoid chinese food and keep your taste buds safe and sound back in malaysia~

Friday comes too quicky everytime with the damn TCI+RPE meeting..don't ask me, i barely know what the abbrev. means, tho, in short, it's an intensive invention brainstorm session we have every week. What is there left for you to INVENT when this is SINGAPORE and not anywhere near a first world country? In comparison, take the neighbouring Australia in comparison.. is 20 years ahead of us technology wise, so WTF will all the unnecessary squeeze? Okay...in a positive manner, i'm just biased coz i need to work on it :P

Hey now..maybe australia is not bad eh? Stray away wow....autumn's here!

It's mooncake and it's too moon-cakey for me to even smell or see it elsewhere. The celebration is so great here that at the Chinese Garden, they need to charge a $12 for entrance fee moon and lanterns VIEWING =.=""" It's different if i pay $12 and get to burn some lanterns+trees down *GRINS...Well, the ambience is everywhere, so there's no point getting away anywhere far..if you can't fight 'em, join 'em! Sooooo, going to orchard lor this weekend to enjoy some autumn shoppingzz and off to the cathay too i guess..I am already darn broke as i simply went for seafood yesterday which cost $30 per person @.@~~~ and now autumn shopping THEY CALL IT. I'll always give in to my urge ~ well.......I'M SUPER DARN BROKEEEE!!! SO STOP ASKING ME TO belanja OK?

Wow..the F1 season is 2 more weeks in Singapore and the ambience is building up also. I was too excited for it when i just realized my friend bought me the ticket back to Malaysia on the poll and race day itself =.= means on dee F1 WEEKEND LAR..haihz..........................in consolation, i can only go for the fashion week here which will last 7 days due to the race, and probably peep at some overdue Diana Krall's in concerto banners~ I guess that's working life.... and of course, i can't afford a grand stand yet. Wait till the next season, yo ^_^

La La..counting my days back to Ipoh in like..1 and a half month's time? yooooo..got a new dog too! Her name's GIN! Can't wait~~ Laaa...ooo it's 5.30pm..packing and ciao!

2008-08-31T02:55:00.005+08:00

I have a dimsum date tmr at 9am and still up at this wee hour, has been some time and still proud i could actually do this! See, i am harping on people's laptop to keep me online and that's purely pathetic! Wait up till i get my personal MAC and BROADBAND!!!! Have been reading of Salome from de Wilde, and that oldie would keep me alive for some time after working hours and some ELLE would do too...

Sooooooo..there's a lot in the shopping list.. and is it lunatic to feel spending in malaysia is cheap? and the inflation was 8.5% till today. So, yes, that indicates i'm somewhere in malaysia for the merdeka sales and i bought a whole lot shiat and still feels cheap! Halo. Pocket empty lor.

Can i not brush my enamels tonight? Why? Coz i'm lazy, and it's 3am. But the angel says NO coz i had kfc for supper. The cholestrol is enough to haunt you so, let's not let the plague go overboard too.

Projects are gonna start next week and can people in the company smile a little more for the sake of getting my algorithms work???! Least, mentor and co-mentor please don't fail on me...Meeting on friday was darn long about annual RPE for invention contribution. Till now, i still wonder why they hired me as i'm such a SOLE in there personality and quality wise. My colleague's quitting for a $4.5kmonth job in US! Goddammit!!!! and he gets a relocation fee of $5k. and he can get an apartment at Alabama(that's where he'll be stamping his aircraft designs) for just $600+!!!!!! SHHHHHHH*t for sg we could only get a COMMON ROOM for that price in terms of $ to $ value. and etc would be cheaper than shiaaat except some high taxes at the end of dee year......... =.= ..what most importantly is i need to DRIVE. without a car, you have absolutely NO LIFE. no wonder no one wants to work in singapore. and i'm soon gonna be one of them. There's so much more out there.

Malaysia-->Singapore-->Then where?

Making ends meet, being a bread winner...ain't easy and spending hurts. But not so really yet till i overdraft my buying power.Credit cards.MUAHAHAHAHHAHA!!! all in my grasp of a procrastinated payment lifestyle. and let's keep the torch burning for a healthy expenditure that i've been holding onto till now ^_^ have confidence in yourself!

i think it's obvious i'm skipping dim sum............i don't know. i dun feel like going to bed but i have to. Sunday always retreats for the Monday blues and Friday always rejoices for all the other days in a week! I think i miss blogging for a while. it's not anymore addictive, it'd been a habit...before i sign off,

HAPPY MERDEKA MALAYSIANS....with a special gift from Permatang Pauh ;)

2008-08-27T18:06:00.003+08:00

Ok..I'm giving a quick one here... i'm hungry and my pants is TIGHT! (most frustrating de facto of the day and i don't know WHY?! : (( ) but i need dinner..gosh. +_+

I think i am liking this job, just here..and other places just slips a little away for a while, except for EUROPE! Maybe it's just the beginning, but the symptoms of not knowing when to hook off for the day is obvious and great gals at my department. Well, for the time being, least, i'm being contented and finally, some good decisions. I smell some harsh meat on the road down...so let's take a look then! Tonight is indian curry for dinner! BYE! Stay tune for the details update, or maybe some deluged post about my job!

2008-08-21T11:24:00.004+08:00

Hi! It has been a long time..4th day at work and still snoring with all the readings "zzz"... need to take a time out, least, it's almost lunch time.

Life at SINGAPORE!

Great, but not as great as it use to be. Things are just different here in every aspect depending on individual suitability. For me, it totally rots when i go for heavy shopping, only knowing i don't have a PERSONAL CARRIER to send me and all of my stuff home comfortably. let's skip the food and but the places here totally rocks! Hmph...Office has been cool and personally no complains. Boss sooooo nice :D Or maybe just trying not to cramp me up so soon, as to keep the worse for the latter.. good or bad thing eh? Hehe...and also trying NOT TO think or talk so much of uncertainties in front. Gawd knows.

but anyhow, work is always not a motivating neither interesting bloggy fuse...talk about meeting back old friends working in singapore is even better! Sometimes, i just slip out of work earlier to get to some meetings, ain't you guys proud of ME??? Old friends and new friends are apertures of my new leaf..hate love the walking too i guess! I've also been nagging most of my malaysia friends to hop over to join me..at least got more ppl teman me shoppy! Shit..i think i could spend a whole lot here. and gawd knows..shuu..

Time to shove the documents away and have lunch..ciao

Goodbye it is finally..

2008-05-28T12:29:00.002+08:00

After rambling for farewells in lots of my previous posts, finally it has came to an end. Friends leaving one by one at sight.. i'm gonna miss endless stuff we did together and my great whole university life. A new phase is gonna begin soon..in some new places, new people, new life and everything anew. I wished i could stare at my ym for much longer just to see the person you wanted him/her to online, but i guess, ym would never be the same again as our lives departs. No more waking up and hogging on ur pc and scolding people with IM status. Facebook and Friendster is not anymore logged in 24 hours. And my blog will have a large tendency to be abandoned for quite some time. No more assignments, exams, lectures and not anymore a student. No more funny business. It's gonna be sad, leaving all memories, once loved and will always be cherished. Even my WMP is randomly playing goodbye songs. Goodbye.

2008-05-22T23:48:00.003+08:00

Thousand stars seem stagnant as the still waters tonight. Poignant. Some twinkles and keeps me twinkling. Fly me to the dreams i never had, catch them and protrude. Already had. Tonight, can i allow my mind to land on a planet where home is the nearest. The planet is my heart, intact, safe and carefree.

Places where no one would find, i kept them hiding up there.

2008-05-21T21:31:00.002+08:00

Urgh. Bad day. Bad health. But silver lining shining like a polished pearl at the edges of province~ In order to gain, there's pain i guess.

Stomach grouchy as a fierce troll. Ouch and gonna lie on the bed early tonight.

As the evening wind wheezed,
as pure as it seems,
Intact as it could be,
Some damn good sceneries.

the majestic Lion city

2008-05-14T00:03:00.003+08:00

Engineers are a bunch of chickens being fed daily with delusional math grains and hopefully all of them grow extensively quick into big fat crazy electrical dictionaries. Just before they enter the slaughter house/exams, they are expected to be well-fed/super fat with crazy complex engineering formulas and theories. After a reputable death/graduation, people/companies, buy/employ you in and eat/make you work like a whore till you sucked up and become impotent in bed.

There you go, 4 more filthy chemistry chapters ahead.

2008-05-09T22:54:00.005+08:00

Life is short. Have an affair.

Saw this line in one of the pop-up adds...and went HAHAHA. Anywayyyy...nice study week, totally holidays. Feels so good, feels so free~ Though..there are a few friends who were emotionally broken recently, so..time will heal is all i could say. cheer up, life is much more meaningful than bearing THAT ROCK on your back~

It's a cozy evening...

why is it totally holidays?

Well..i had pretty much gatherings for the whole week including some ex-colleagues, ex club members, old friends and ex-housemates. All pretty 'old' people :D but yet NICE. Went for all sort of food..and especially the korean food tonight is incredibly saucy! too bad i didn't had any pictures taken..excitedly busy talking while dining. Incredible coz we had a three-timer dessert as we sat at the restaurant for 3 hours :D nice place and recommended for a second try..too bad, no pictures, and i can't even remember the shop's name.. :P ask me to bring you there then :D

and had RM50 satay celup for a two-person serving =.=" the other day..

SUPER SWEAT baby.......

RM 50 bucks!!!! spoiling melaka tourist attraction..

O-K-A-Y one place i really remember..is taipei tealeaf cafe at jalan ong kim wee, melaka. it's really a great place for gathering..never sat there less than 3 hours and always drank more than a cuppa. wadya think? oooh..and mcd is always nice for classmates gathering hmmph :)

Well..these are the affairs i'm having quite pretty well..and not any sorta you could think of those ;) but i kinda agree with that line..although it's kinda HAHAHA.

i think you could read that i am happy.

YES. VERY INCREDULOUS HAPPY :D

-Only 3 more weeks in Melaka..and that's all for five years....with all beautipoooool memories~ i love you~~~

2008-05-04T21:57:00.014+08:00

Beach and all of it

MSC status yo

It's crappy coz it's another Sunday. I wonder why weeks and weeks pass extremely quick, like any other bamboozlement of time, just that..this is for real. Although it's crappy but it had been a tired and really fun weekend at the beach in Kuala Linggi, Malacca. ^_^

The beach was awesome, totally washed everything away with it's strong waves and cute lil' ripples. And one reason why i joined MMU-- the neverending exploration. and the only club i did not regret to join --OUTRECS (Outdoors Recreational Club)

as we walked down to the sand..

It was just a 2-day short trip with great games activities and what i love most, freely attached to the nature and wildlife. At one point, i was thinking of getting a job full-time about nature. But i guess, on top of all, technology now rules the rage and limitations of human. So, it's better to be in control than to be controlled. Though, it's a swear i'll never give up nature, and hopefully pend to make the world a better place, if not, least, a cleaner place.

under the tree silhouette

By the time the tide was up, my cute sparkly goggles and water bottle went along with it. Time and tide waits for no men. That was all coz i was busy swimming and messing around and only realized my stuff was half swallowed by the waves later then. By the luck of god, necessities like my slippers and cap were still safe from the evil waves. Pouted a little, but then got distracted by some volleyball, campfire and naughty camp mates....then i started messing around again. i could forgive the evil ripples but i cannot forgive evil people :P

wave ripples~

I guess i would be the city girl who runs off to the countryside every weekend. Life is balanced, soothing...and less white strands will mushroom on my smooth and silky hair~ and there's an allowance of not cleaning yourself up properly in the wilds. I know it sounds sucky, but do as the Romans do. maybe just meant to be a reason to let off for some time and taste the different routines.

Another sad thing beneath all goodwill is pollution, though, human still play at his own will portraying the guardian of earth. BULLSHIT. i hate propagandas, lies and undone promises. i hate all of it. but human lives because of those reasons. and those absurd low humans, i despise.

look at all this and will you be disheartened?

sleepy cat in the daze with trash rubble scene

if everyone would start exploring more, out of their comfort zones, most probably they are a little smarter not to litter to their desires. I give a bull to education, it gives birth to nerds and causes really bad brain saturation to students, which is not healthy at all. Broadening of horizons are very important. I did not learn language from books, but from people and communication. I neither learnt Science and Maths from classrooms, but from logics and interest.

Well, appreciate and love the wonders of nature.

Rock 'cucumber'

crabbies =^_^=

baby cat fishes..didn't know they bred under rocks..

crayfishy >.<>

i just can't get enough of it. it's sad to be back to reality...but all of it boosted me well...Reality is all about 2 more weeks more uni-life, graduation and decisions.. but i will still love nature, and come back for more!

2008-04-23T23:40:00.004+08:00

The SUPER QUARTER POUNDER is OFF!

Mentioned, talked about, lamented, gone crazy with, went bonkers without day-night, swam against strong streams with heavy super duper eye-bags and massive red pimples which spoiled my prom........... IS GONE, OFF, ENDED

---> FYP NO MORE! YAY!!!!!!

look at fyp, then look up at assignments.
look at fyp, then look onto lab reports.
look at fyp, then look into final exams.

HAHAHAHA.

Yea, there are pieces i still need to pick up and patch, but those ain't obstacles anymore, mister. It's not that the stress is totally off, just that FYP IS OFF, does not mean you don't have the aftermath. The aftermath is horrible too, but post is much much much better than the pre. Did FYP worth everything for a couple of white hair starting to mushroom on your head? Some really bad health and all muscles turned into fats? Rushing life, super insufficient sleep mode, and some didn't even brush teeth to pass up their thesis. (oh..no no..me not included)

HAHAHAHA.
.
.
.
.
.

I sound like I'm done with everything, but in actual, everything starts from zero again in the working world. I guess i managed to have this supreme level up in my system in my final year and might get even more exponentially horrible in work... *put aside ***put aside this thinking

why being an engineer is so tough? Have to hold on tight, real tight, super tight to go through thick and thin...the only rewarding thing is achievements, not even money. but Hey, i love my life. i love my decisions. i love my family and friends. Only good things come in life, after the hardest moments..thanks to all those who brought me through my final year especially fyp~~~

once more can ar??

FYP NO MORE!!!!!!!!!!

2008-04-21T01:16:00.004+08:00

In the midst of everything...some little guardian angels came by....

shan..whr r u hiding leh?

MISS YOU ALL SO MUCH!!!!!! Whrz another one? Oh..went to U.S. d....

and happy birthday to Neoh~ may all happy regards fall above you..and i'm in between to steal all away.. :P coz fyp presentation coming ^_^ borrow a bit of luck first~

Things got so much better~~ and life got so much more meaningful... ARGH!!!! I MISS YOU ALL SO MUCHHHHHHHH!!!! Thanks for coming all the way down just to see me~~~~ muaks muaks muaks..it's better than anything in the world for today..as you all brought more than happiness to me ^_^

~~~

2008-04-18T01:52:00.002+08:00

In this large large large world...there is only one small small small me..then there are always very big, LARGE...huMOngouS, eternity troublesome mind-tucking endless TORTURE that leads you all the way...until i am here, today.

Then, when you look back at all those years you build, sometimes you feel proud, sometimes feel regret..but most of the time, you'll laugh at it and continue walking through.

i might not be good but i will be my best.

2008-04-17T02:07:00.003+08:00

I am having this lovely night by my side...and what more could i whine for?

only those lovely moments... :)

2008-04-08T21:36:00.002+08:00

This week and next week, then...

IT WILL BE HELL-A-OVER!!! There are some excitement, sadness and all together achieving inevitable freedom IT SHOULD BE! Shouting out loud could help a little in this kinda critical week~ It's something worth a cheer though temporal..

Prom will be this Saturday...but totally no feelings for it..Hopefully tomorrow's shopping spree will brighten up some mood. Blame all to the unfinished business. FYP could never be finished.. it just replays..unlike my windows media player..although it replays..but it never gives stress.

It has been rather blank these few days...with total horrible weather here in Malacca.. hate/love this place..

I just wanna tell myself...after this and the next week..........we'll all be GODs above heaven..in the mean time, as the clock is ALWAYS running so quickly, gotta catch time and vow to beat those heavy obstacles down! If we've been through it for almost 5 years now......what is it to be fear of at the end of the day?

2008-04-01T13:10:00.003+08:00

Pretty much half conscious now due to early classes aftermath.. @.@

Have been reading kennysia.com alongside with head-heavy notes on table top though..and i would say it is rather lame... I do not deny by reading it, gives me kinda..."feel like writing" energy that I've lost since few years back. And at one point of time, i thought writing was none other than lame ramblings..and opinionated to be just a space when you have nothing to tend to..well, i guess i couldn't deny it is still a very important part of me..and that's why i am still keeping in touch with that inner-self of mine :) It was shocking to know that there are people who put blogging in their itineraries..and me? wassup..but anyhow, still a part of entertainment besides all those boring chemistry formula and professor's smart notes which i could hardly take in.. .

For the change of the century (soon), people are getting too stressed up of their lives. As i was sprawling along campus today..some SPCA(Society of Prevention to Cruelty of Animals) people came around pledging for donation in a furious tone. " You MUST donate at least once in a while" =.=" Eventually..i have met such incidents a few times during town hangouts where those street donations come up to you and usually, you would just show them a 'shoo' face, thus forget about the whole thing..though, some of them were precisely furious too. But ..this is a proper donation booth, and yet, people are still furious.. i guess it's the weather or..stress?

..the harder you throw out a ball to the wall..the harder and quicker it bounces back..ain't it right?

Then back to the animals. We went browsing the abuse gallery nearby.. i really like doing something for them, in a proper and correct way i guess :)

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Returning to reality...

There are so many task in my to-do list that someone would never finish reading it.. All together with some weird weather here in malacca and a jobless soon-to-be graduate, just creates a larger radiating whirlpool. Though i am always in great trouble handling all those last minute schedules and late nights with table lamp killing my eyesight....and ye, that's LIFE! all jumbled up into one brain wire.. and glad that wire still holds still :D can you believe i eventually enjoy all these workload and i could be feeling goo-ey.......and time passes so quickly, damn you, clock!

..Seeing juniors studying too hard for themselves...sometimes, just wanna go over and tell them to spread and enjoy campus life more than just having that stressful forehead.. smack that cringe, babe!

No, i am not fooling you coz it's april's fool, that's too childish and please don't try to fool me..coz i would really believe you sincerely :)

Another great sleepy day ahead. yosh :D

2008-03-27T03:28:00.007+08:00

2 months more to graduation?!

These are one of the best times, posted and proved to be the proudest of us.

It was enjoyable times at every tuesday and wednesday nights..badminton and futsal accordingly.. in the weeks till now. Sports is the most trivial thing..it gives and takes so much. Gives us the strength we didn't believe we had..and takes away my dinner as at the end of the events...tummy grumbles and ups for yumcha session again ^_^ Bonds and surges good hormonal emotions as in..stress reliever i believe? Kaka.

ye..kick ball..

futsal kaki...they were too shy to take pics on field..or too serious to chase dee ballie

after futsal, smell socks...

yo..photo with top ganas scorer ler

No pics for badminton though, too bad...coz everyone's too excited to kill some feathers..Guess it's kinda sad as it will be temporarily abolished till we resume it back after the FYP presentation. Anyway..finals seem nothing to be big deal of anymore..that's the spirit!

oh..and not forgetting the gal that stays at home..

passport size photo

Love life...time to zzz...tomorrow will be another good day..hopefully...

2008-03-22T15:10:00.005+08:00

Time is running fast, but good times will last..

Hanging around likewise, another decaying dirt of earth...tra la la la~ just enough to dance around with time and yes time dances around too~ From the huge elephant to dee minute speckle..from true blue intelligence to enjoyable moments..from laziness to crappy late night 6am assignment rush hours..woo hoo

Still hanging around though insufficient time, taking down a beer or two to prolong some young nights...sprawling late night streets with illegal racers invitation, but shyly declining with some good emo control..fa la la la~

Cheers to the crazy hours,
Cheers the things we did wrong nor right...
Cheers to the big fat beer
and 27 dresses.

2008-03-03T01:44:00.003+08:00

Growth.

It has been a widely spoken topic at different perspectives. We were trained to observe and hypothesized from bean to sprout. We were tested on ancestral knowledge till current descendants, and not leaving out.. all sorts of experience compensates and built who we are today. In the end, we are what we are in no denial. How specifically unique we grew and became today. The past, present and future are three junctions we manage to label what growth is, rethink, possibly rebuke and rebuild.

How this word inspire every parent, every guardian, to provide the best for their young-lings is fascinating, likewise, captured on National Geographic about infant parenting of the wild life. The sacrifice done is priceless and yet, some do take for granted..to refute, not some, but most. As crossing another junction of growing up, there will be choices and decisions to lead the road..and there are things we have no choice but to put down or put up with. It doesn't mean we have to forget and just go. It's sad to see not all get the best of growing up, but part and parcel of it is definitely not perfect.. Maybe balance is the answer, no it is a MUST, least for myself...

How much do we know of ourselves? Some say they have good life but they do not. Some do have a good life but they say not. So which are you? By growing up, we see the phase of evolution and may not realize we have grown. Funny eh... not all look deep beyond the mirror. And yes, good and bad..we just can't run away but grow with them. If you say you are good or bad, you are not, you are both, as everyone is.

There are things you want to forget but can't. There are things you are supposed to remember, though, you forget. There are things you can't deny and forget in a mist. Just like how mum taught you to cross a road, look right, look left, then again....walk along..look front to not fall easily..yet, look behind so that you do not get tripped..look around..to be aware. It was instilled.

Be wary and count every good moments, do not bypass them, but take in together to grow. Plant the bad seeds and i bet some good blossoms will grow too. Just remember you are not the only one..everyone's growing up.

So, how did your day went?

Wednesday to be

2008-02-27T11:37:00.003+08:00

I was pledging for some company during the past few days, where walking two by two was some pleasure and neither torture nor necessity anymore. Weird and life just turned around. Woke up today, though dormitory healing insufficient, but still feeling thankful and proceeded with errants. Feeling the need to be alone.... Just need a nap during late evening i guess.

Sometimes i feel I'd been forced onto the ring though i just wanna be a spectator. It does not feel good and i dislike it. Just hope days would shine brighter, however, it's absurd to seek bright days that do not damage your skin with high amount of UV. Haha. See, being observed is like an unlawful crime, where people intrude you privacy with their staring eyes. Ask some law undergrads to help fight me out of the situation seriously.

Anyway, still not any near success or failure. Glad that at least some expectations were fulfilled, but there's much a long path to deal with. Grass and road side flowers....the cumbersome beauty that less will realize and appreciate.

And wonder since when i was this deep..

Shopping could be predicted to be a little overwhelming but worth dee investment dude. Ciao for my lunch.

2008-02-13T22:58:00.003+08:00

As quick as breeze, 1 year..

aaaaa...full of commitments, the death knots of grown ups. So till you hear another whine for the day, live up for every moment with no regrets.

Missing KL life...yoohoo...left things there, left everything everywhere....

Maybe i should feel guilty for all the crimes I've committed, least, be awakened and resume student life. (but just dun feel like a student anymore)

No more worries. No more qualms. No more leaving things around telling myself real swift strict. No more clubbing :P

Maybe as quick too, 4 more months.

2008-01-07T14:33:00.000+08:00

At this point of time, another plus minus of 4 days...i will be humming some sweet scent homey lullaby chords at me room window..just like any other fairy tale. For me, a temporary one, but still worth looking forward for :D

The new year, remarks new stuff, a whole lot of them. Don't know which is which coz barely sorted out myself yet...as usual, procrastinate like any other year. Buttt...currently thinking whether to keep my short length and wonder, will the boys still melt...wahahaha..and well..stay fit and healthy would be one, too, i guess..

About studies........ *pray giler to the sky* that FYP will be a SUCCESS SUCCESS...puh-lease...puh-lease..puh-lease.. sweatttt -.-""

About work...wanna find a suitable job, and hopefully get my places of interest, as well as people of interest..wakekekeke...

Nothing much more to forge onto the emblem of 2008..... and wishing all a great year ahead! good life, prosperity and what you fill in the blank is what you get!

2007-12-19T10:49:00.000+08:00

Wassup wassup..It's almost Christmas! and well..skating seems addictive at this mistletoe season. Work is great and the latter, should be greater and will kinda miss this place after i finish. Anyway...the holiday mood seems to have sprung everyone out of their office seats, while some, still maintain some calm mood, be it hols or not. I kinda have lots of pics to upload..but forgot to bring dee cable to office -.-" ...

I am beguiled by life--> work and people and love and studies, all promptly protruding like some white water rush. Beguiled by miracles, philosophies, good and bad people, sleep and pre-emptive leave which left all my colleagues go " Maner Michelle ni?"

I wonder why the essence is so strong.

Maybe being philosophical doesn't bring you anywhere unless you practise the philosophies. However, a practitioner is usually taken in as an extremist of a wrong ideology till ..the sun shines and the people are happy. Typical thinking we call it, though..i don't wanna be typical.

So i thought i have lost my lingual skills! There goes my long winded aforementioned..

Think. Love. and.. Express Well. Some new guilds and still many more instilled and kept inside for the past few months. Great experience, Love Life.

2007-11-02T12:40:00.000+08:00

8.30am to 5.30pm, Monday to Friday....

That's how life is..

Wednesdays- hit the cinemas for 6 bucks movies, Fridays- out for big makan... and weekends pass as swift as the sea breeze.. and the cycle goes on for the next and the following..

it's not that kay-ale doesn't rock, but with all expenses limitations, things may be a bit difficult. Ah well, my 3 months is gonna be a great one. Money..always the hot issue. Hot chicks flooding the parades, expensive food and glamorous outcomes everywhere. And getting use to the massive jam is actually an achievement :D

Life's evolving.. you gotta know everything even if you don't., just blend and flow..gotta speak even if you don't know how. Nice supervisor, great colleagues and good working environment. Mmmmmmmmmmm.........currently helping out on some autocad jobs and designing database software for the ISO 17025 system..peningz lalat..super freedom at office..yay yay~~

Ahhhh...love my officeeee...weee...fridayyyzzzzz.......

Can't wait for first pay cheque and out for clubs~ yo yo~~~

got Japz and FYPz lagiz..sial punya --...

F.I.R. - Blue Doors Ahead

2007-10-10T18:04:00.000+08:00

I stand up high plunge in this splendid city tonight
There's no one but me with gravity I can measure life

I try to hide from your love and pride
So many times I found myself lost in this wonderland and cry

How can I define all these blue doors ahead
Tell me secrets and then make me wild isn't the true love inside

I rise and compare my hand with this city tonight
There's no one but me and silently...
I get down and smile

I get down and smile , I get down and smile.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS and hope that my intern is as fun as yours, subtly, vice versa! Outta Melaka for 3 months~

dead knots furball

2007-10-06T00:17:00.000+08:00

He was simply having his good time on the table in the hall as i barbered his whole, yet, still carried the dark clouds as he scuffled through the slumps (plastics, law books and leftover mamees). As i , too scuffled my fingers through his fur, only realised that a furball lump was detected at his top torso part, and then, too, only realised i need to extra cut that off my lil' baby. It just got my nerves to not get it done asap. Soon, half an hour later, baby turned into angst and bit a non-owner. Kesian, terdengar jeritan sungguh dari bilik pintu terbuka. Roomie came running in with a bloody index, and went straight to the tissue box. Her face turned into his face (by referential observation). Well, i presume either he just woke up, or just blame it on the dark clouds? He'd lost some weight and growing well. Gosh, he needs some discipline and love.

Furballs, hehe.

Something on being too lazy and not substantial enough deserves an A- to A range? The words kept repeating and they just slammed my afternoon nap to dust today... i guess the worries doesn't vanish and damn, it comes back so subsequent..what i need to do is just...do it. i need to get some switches for my neuro-transmitters, coz they ain't off when it's supposed to be. Talking neuro, packed up a tad bit to leave melaka in about..a week's time, only to know that my anatomy book is a darn fat book which i can't fit into any boxes.

...eyes tired but brain doesn't shut off, and heart isn't listening to the brain at all. What is all these nonsense incoherent connections? wishing for the best sleeping pills---> photonics notes, HIMYM........

and off to bed..

Days lasted too short to be caught on the way~

cracked the 40 characters limit on y!m, thanks to a friend. yo..short days. RESIDENT EVIL on next wednesday..and before that, some lightsaber encounters to die for..may the force be with me..

2007-10-02T13:00:00.000+08:00

More obstacles to run over in time to come... and would i still be the same me? There were some nice days, and certainly some not. Woke up with some qualms, thinking stuff like...can i? should i? may i? the world is that..people lost trust in you and it goes vice versa at all directions, pretty lost sometimes and somehow, i just dun understand but i have to accept it.

It just rolls..

In the morning where afternoon took place too quick, would you have any regrets for the hours that you've lost?

I wanna be comfortable and do things. So, let it just....roll..

Public news today..always awful and eerie. Take care, gurls out there.

Wee..it's study week here~

2007-09-24T01:23:00.000+08:00

It's some temporal off-the-hook session to let some hair down. Went to see a friend at town today, and it felt so nice :) Gonna miss everything in melaka for 3 months soon. Anyway, rather grateful to some good lucks and charms, now that, training stuff is settled, and null worries to come by. I am looking forward to it with hopefully, average hope and great minds.

Minds.....much precarious concurrently.

VERY OBVIOUS when i actually dosed off in the highway journey yesterday. Maybe the Ford was too comfy... hehe..nah..too exhausted from some two-night imsonia. Imsoniac without a reason, weird. Isn't finals i betcha, coz i don't feel it at all this moment. Highway journey? To settle training stuff lor. Lazy wanna elaborate. Just put it as a highway journey. Came back like an evening slop, skipped dinner, and went straight right to bed...it doesn't sound good, but things really worked out well, and i'm totally glad :D

FYP presentation ended good as mentioned and kinda love my life right now. Boost for it, i hope i will~

and...time really flies..look at the gurls..

I think my passion for writing has begun to deteriorate...not to the point of lack of interest, but to the point of hesitation, as again, weird. Sometimes i don't really get myself. Hesitation might had became one of my weakness.. and maybe a good thing in some other stuff.. but i don't know why or where did this bulge up.

For the first time, study week tasted so good, better than holidays..you have something to do at least, and that's why it's better. I kinda start like being a noob, we always worked hard to be a better someone, but somehow, i wished i were a noob in stuff..it's so much easier, and there's always people around..such warmth, hardly defined. But now, in some things, i am no longer a noob....and life gets harder, different and hopefully, prudent. And..i do love this word prudent.

How I Met Your Mother is rockin` great.

1 week till finals...
3 weeks till back to ipoh......
and 1 month to work.

I SO WANNA GET FURNITURES FOR MY NEW APARTMENT FROM IKEA!!! and can't wait for some good diet and exercise back home~~missing everyone~

Only shines...when god's greatest gifts were granted..

2007-09-15T01:30:00.000+08:00

It's like I got lost in these woods for some long years back, and still lost in it. Maybe i don't intend to find the route out at all. I am having this nice time here...*flashback* S.H.E. and karaoke..just got the girls going. And now, we are so far apart, so grown up, so succumbed to our own lifestyles. I so wished to be back there. It has never been far, to sing our hearts out, to be loud and to be true.

I had a massive presentation for my final year project, a massive meal, a massive shopping, a massive exercise and massively drained...totally, gawd. It has been a gruesome week, so i'm just taking this weekend off. Haggard, and i love the aloe taste on my lips. Gosh, beauty is fragrant. There's so much work still, some never ending proclaims... and i loveee it i can throw these tantrums on just the right person. And those beside me all these times..help and support..zillion of thanks and hugs*.

This time, now, totally, massive.

And then..next step of life, work. soon.

2007-09-07T03:50:00.000+08:00

Must must must must must kill myself to bed......

don't wanna sleep. so don't wanna wake up tomorrow for more suffocation. Least, give me a sweet dream. ARGH. Brain lodged with heavy stuff, can't do anything, can't not do anything.

Someone, gun me down. . . . . .

Monday blue-ks!

2007-09-04T03:05:00.001+08:00

Full of Your Pee

Perhaps i really owed myself some postings. And now, life became too sufficient! with all those presentations and last minute coding stuff. There goes working people laughing me off. HAHA. funny brat. YES. i am waning, so laugh ahead, all of you you you, working people..blueks. i also got the HAHAs from the week 2 presentation people...-.-...... Being first isn't really a bad thing..atleast all those nerve bitting bugs are off me sooner! till then! i'll laugh the hell outta all of you!!! WUAHAHAHA!

It seems like i'm behavioural to be work stricken so badly at last minutes, that it really gives me the creep. Without that, i am just another lazy piece of crap. Another week to big-bang-mama-talk and hell knows what's gonna reigns. and yeah, finally i am working on my fyp. All those bull on the gantt chart, now looking at it...all Super High Intensity Training (quoted : gundamz84) trash info.

12th seems like May 13 to me, the yet to happen but burn you when it comes. The only consolation to such idiotic schedule is probably that my session is in the afternoon. And some compensation was a great Merdeka weekend (Even Mahathir kept his heart alive till post-Merdeka for IJN... patriotism)

Went for the World Fireworks Competition 2007 at Putrajaya yesterday. We only managed to catch a glimpse of it by the highway, as we were wayyyyyy jammed out by the post-Merdeka traffic on the North South. I was rather happy with such an immense road trip, and to fulfill dissatisfaction, we also managed on some supper at Cyberjaya and took off with whole lot of pictures from Poh's olympus. The most exciting part was, we decided to leave Melaka at only 6pm. One damn reason we didn't get a proper view of the finale, but cool, i was in Putrajaya for one sunday night.

The toilet at street mall was unbelievably...... LOCKED when all of us were in the verge of bursting bladders....

With 'great' food, come great expenses...so...

chill...arh...messy hair :(

.
..
...
.....
.........

and enjoy the scenes...

Take 1 : Architectural

Take 2 : Blurred but nice dimension

Take 3 : PICC(Putrajaya International Convention Centre) and the Fireworks Carnival

Take 4 : YOU MUST BE THINKING IT'S THE FIREWORKS FROM THE COMPETITION! *ekkkk* (These are the ones from Malacca town on the Merdeka eve :P)

Take 5 : Night township aka. red alert map.

~pictures courtesy of Olympus of 7MP and two Sony Ericsson of 2MP

Much thoughts, much memories...

want to get my fat ass to kick some ass soon. anywayz, advert a bit...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MMU 3RD TAEKWONDO INTERVARSITY TOURNAMENT
Date : 9th Sept 2007
Time : 8am-6pm
Venue : Exam Hall

PLEASE COME SUPPORT! Admire the skills of martial arts..
with strength and honour!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

almost 4 now, and hopefully kong off with some sweetest dreams ever, and back to work tomorrow to ENSURE my program works!!!!

p/s : baby's fat and heavy eeek...

Indie-pendie-day

2007-08-31T19:05:00.000+08:00

Came back at 9am today @.@... was not virtually wild anywhere on the eve but just sat by and had a HUGE chat with friends. and it was really nice, practically what i adore most, at the century of time. Unlike those were the days where we really go all out for it.Well, kinda subdued :D

What we did yesterday till today?

We grabbed pizza for dinner...later out to bowlz and poolz, straight to MCD around 3-7am....and curtains closed with a lil' dim sum wee, with all haggard faces.

Just a light one, and i like it. Moderate, simple and it captures my heart.

Slept from 10 to 3 and woke up for a lil bite, and continued till 7pm now..when people rang me up for dinner. yay~~ going for asam fish later^^

-------------------------------------------------

When we put words together, intact, it is comprised of such elements. Even if there were dirt which disdains...eventually blends and put off to a new day. Life's best roads, not relinquished but rejoiced for a better tomorrow and reminiscing past. There is no dead locks to unhook. Change your mind a little sometimes, try acceptance, poised you'll be.

As the evening culminates..nothing will much more beautiful than life itself.

Conveying my sincere Condolence to my 2 lovely friends, PLH and PLY for the sudden leave of their dear beloved father last week. May prayers and best wishes lightens their path. Glad that God has found and saved him.

2007-08-21T19:45:00.000+08:00

The Calling - Believing

I'm one man to make a difference
I'm one soul all persistence
In a dark world, just trying to make things right
Choices we weren't given
Any heroes, and our decision
Is to stand up and fight for ourselves

To be free
Is all we want to be
When everything seems so far out of reach
But I know, no matter where we go
I'll never stop believing in me

Woke up bent and broken
Just to find that fate has spoken
All I call out I call out for change
For every moment that remains
For every sinking stone to find its place
Long before they're washed away

We've been waiting for too long
We've been giving in to wrong
And we've been broken to pieces one by one

We're gonna know
We're gonna know
When the moment comes

The week after a week's break..

2007-08-18T15:35:00.000+08:00

Rachael Lampa-If you Believe

Late afternoon singing Wannabe by Spice Girls cyberly over the net with da girls over at Bunga Raya...Today seems.. typically nice, weather cloudy and ain't sunny~

Feelings..ain't so stable recently, probably moved by nice and bad stuff around me, at times, very very moved indeed. Though, it has been a busy week with a few planning, fyp and some good badminton. Resuming badminton after 10 years ain't that bad eh?! Just forgetting some smash techniques, the point system and probably sucked at serving a little :D. Rewinding time, i used to walk to the sports complex with my primary dudes to get to badminton, so badly so, we could play for half a day in a go, and that was good times.

FYP--> as usual...slacking right behind and have been bugging my 'no-entry mode' supervisor. Wuahahaa..days ain't good if there's a baggage on you everywhere, but just depends how you manage it to enjoy and successfully bringing the baggage along with you^^and those encouraging words poured, though, has been quite some time..did not ferment and stayed fresh every time i need them..precious.. and..thanks......

So many to do, in so little time^^ and..finally some darn midterm exams has been discovered for next week's schedule.

Have been involved in some political talk(privately) recently due to..influences!!! blame those influence! Maybe it's soon to be our 50th national day and some voting registration urge in me. Suddenly do feel like throwing a few tantrums towards the country and supporting WEE's version of our national anthem. But then again, rationality and nationality!!!

and..it's a bliss to be ignorant....

Here comes work urge..and sleeping urge at the same time. Which one do you think i would choose? :>

Ciaoz.

two weeks from twenty - yellowcard

2007-08-11T11:16:00.000+08:00

Readings : The Brontes, Wuthering Heights

Nice day, early dimsum with the Law fellas --- suddenly need to be typically well-versed among them, seemed so pressured, yet nice, joyful and never'd been this early since long...great. This social lingual inept syndrome is never gonna get to me, no no, babe.

Argh, i missed the 8th MMU Convocation 2007 this weekend. There's gonna be so much people mourning for my absence.. ngekz. And hope they will miss me more too :"> Oh well, they actually do.Traditionally, convocations are expected to be the extravagant grandeur, proof of your qualities and your degree accreditation. And juniors like us, will always go harp on opportunities as such : cheek the celebrities and lush them with mushy gifts, witness them glitter on the day itself and flash them with cameras. As to say, those moments were great, and friends were great too, till then. Missed those times...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~
TIOMAN
~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~

Best shot 1 : Blue Sky Sea Water

Best Shot 2 : Fun, white sand and bikiniz ;)

Best Shot 3 : The evening set Salang Harbour

Missed swimming in the sea so much so, i could kill for another dip with the corals beneath, imagine how the beach had hinged on me, perfectly under-the-coconut-tree. Pin on me for another trip like this...i would, too, kill for it. Best part was the outdoors and seeing the guys drunk, momo-focco...damn cutiez. And what we've shared there shall remain in me forever. I guess, goods sold are not exchangeable? Good times, passed quickly..sweet memories beheld! :D

And then, life back here.. and missing ipoh much after talking to tyng and joanne for some time last nite. Family, always top of the list, too. what i could see recently, immaturities everywhere..and people are not growing up. So, grow up, then you'd understand what you see is not what you saw...and i believe, what belongs to me shall be mine, despite all over again now.

Best relaxing shot : Life under the coconut tree

no inklings without blinks
neither fate nor bad fat cake

2007-08-01T02:26:00.000+08:00

O . Ov

In certain depth, certain compromises should might as well... cancel off, unnoticeable. How words import demeanour, very interesting. As if a picture could paint a thousand words? WRONG. How actions lighten the hearts, very nice. Then, words and actions came together... and formed lies, which broke hearts, sealed souls, and had begun the art of not believing no more.

As if all these could be peered through a mere formula... sung by songs, truth or lies, you know best. Trust your heart, sail your feelings, for they will never fool you, but only blind the strong believers.

2007-07-27T14:38:00.000+08:00

weekend. weekend. weekend.

Spiritually dysfunctional in whatsoever activities, or may utter so that, solely, things do not interest me easily. As to say, the weekend is gonna be a long one... till midterm break comes, then, it's time to unleash without any exams and final year dilemma nudged behind for the mean time!!!

TIOMAN YEH !!!! \:D/

First and foremostly, i would like to utter a big fat thank you to all sponsors (esp birdie) and seconders out there in this trip :">, without you all i am nothing..*throw me roses* *bow* *bow* sincerely..Nevertheless, hopefully wanna work on some academics this weekend, and set some datelines.. furthermore, midterm exam next friday, and i ain't getting anything out of it. Workload heavy, dude!

Despite all regulatory head hacking, mind thrusting, procrastinating damnation workload, peace shall remain, refined *cheerz*!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If you can't get out of it, get into it, have fun coz it's meant to be :D

The hue in you shall escalate as such a wild geese beneath the sets and dawns on a skyline journey, whilst horizons point guidelines and not limits.

Intelligence is casted upon, never take it for granted ;)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once upon a time
Somewhere far away from here
I was drowning in a deep sleep
Got no ground beneath my feet
And there's so many faces
I'm New York and I'm Japan
There's so many things that I want to know
But I'll never understand...

Now I'm dreaming in red
Just drifting away
I'm dreaming in red
Come and take me away

I just got to get it right
Before I make it wrong
Cause I'm breaking out and rising up
While the world is falling down...

I see the sun behind the night, sky
One last moment before I say goodbye...

Once upon a time
Somewhere far away from here...

~The Calling - Dreaming in Red~

2007-07-23T04:09:00.000+08:00

My Late Night Avenues

A place for refuge, a time which really takes who i am. *yawnz* It's late, and i like it. I usually get a lot out of these late hours. 6 weeks has passed by in a zap and so so quick, it's half of the semester already. Trying hard to get lazy butts out of animes and dramas as much as possible, wanna concentrate on work but eventually failed.

Weekend was nice. We went hunting WJ's birthday present on Saturday night and end up in a happy yumcha session (the venue is easily figured right :D) :

weegie bee :D
Director of the nite...

*shy shy poison victim2* (dearest qong) and i
presenting you.. The scorpioniac ym status lover and a super fyp worker award of the year...

*slap slap* and *shy shy* poisoner witches
Oh not mentioning...they are black and white magic witches all year around..boyfriends and husbands indispensible..poor me, they ain't sharing ;)

*shy shy poison victim1* and i

(suka gambar ni sebab nampak ceriaaa :D).. Sugar daddy aka. BFP of the year..alfredoooooo

ALL THE HARD WORK FOR...

a tribute..

Burger special 'birthday cake' at 0000 on 17th July 2007

wee~ all the sayangz :D

Since ages since i posted some pictures here. Hopefully we stay like this till the end of time :">

Life has been rocking great, though a bit worries here and there. Put the tad bit away...missing home a little and happy that parents calling often ^^ Was quite glad too in some debugging business about my FYP with some help from my senior and hope to do more tomorrow. Sometimes things don't really matter anymore. Just wanna follow the flow of my feelings and ain't suppressing no more~~ I don't wanna regret. Just don't want to...haha..but well, not all are expressed either. Catch me if you can.

My...it's 5. Gonna hit the sack soon. May week6 be nice and nosy. It's working Mondayyyyy again.. More squash to come?

Guy Next Door - I've Been Waiting for You

2007-07-19T00:26:00.000+08:00

バンガロは大きですね... >< ..今から痛いね。。。ちんちんさんの不好！！！

If you'd knew me, and took me to the stars, as well as read them to me, not less, reached out, somehow, things would be different.

Words could love and hurt the most. 言葉がとても愛と怪我成りました。

2007-07-15T22:24:00.000+08:00

How should i put words into it, so difficult. Don't even know how to describe or write it out. Just wanna find a chance to talk and covey to make it all clear. Guts I need your blessings, and pray that i have my strength.

*clears mind* *blink*blink* just gotta do what is right for once and for all.

~~~~~~*~~~~~~

It was a nice dinner till...we witnessed a couple in a fight during dinner. Dee husband almost wanted to hit the wife. May all's well be well.

Found an article about robotics in medical application and FPGA implementation on medical imaging. Kind of cool and interesting, hope to advance in these fields in future. Nice nice reading. (*O* aaaaaaaaaaa reminds me about FYP.... aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa) Nice sunday, nice weekend.. mmmm hmmm...sleep sleep.. wanna flip myself on the green grass and enjoy the evening set...weee~ wee to sweet memories too :">

Thursday's thrusting turmoil

2007-07-12T14:32:00.000+08:00

Brain dead. Been listening to some 90's, soothin'...

There is so much on the list... lemme seeee :

-CT proposal and research
-Laser assignment
-Laser lab report x 2
-Japanese past year
-FYP-FYP-FYP-FYP-FYP-FYP- ( and these could built some fine border patterns)

*SCREAMS**SCREAMS**SCREAMS**SCREAMS**SCREAMS**SCREAMS*

i was thinking..i could scribble some jap, then go to sleep... drag myself to law tutorial, yawn in jap and go kick ass? just attended law this morning...and t'was sooooooooo f***ing boringgg.. chatted all the way (DIE DIE DIE in FINALS!). Just completed my Laser Tech lab sessions, feeling relieved without necessary intimate one-to-one conversation with my lecturer anymore..benci benci benciiii...blek :P and YES, he SUCKS in conversation! every one of 'em!

adding some personal memorandums would be a proper : diet, exercise, social and time management. *peace to last minute subdue arrest for the latter dude. la la~

WHY SO BLARDY LAZY??!! how to graduate? how to get black belt?? how to get my jap pass in few months time???

aiyaaa..dunwan tok liao la ..wanna do work liao laa.. :( :( :(

Btw, should i hit the club this weekend? :D

say you love me all around the world..oh please..say you love me

ru guo - zhangdongliang

2007-07-05T01:20:00.000+08:00

This year...and then ahead, perhaps, beautiful and hideous and all cramps in together like no other businesses. *shakes butt* feels so free... has been doing the usual, late nights, tkd, Japanese, classes.. and oh gosh..must be forgetting FYP in the list. Just got a hook on THE DEVIL WHO WEARS PRADA and A WALK TO REMEMBER recently. Old nice shows, and they just made me wanting to whoosh back to the 90s.

What some good news is that my parents added extra allowance for me this month!!!!

^$_$^

definitely not telling the amount..but just some sufficienceeee to lmf funding i guess..mum and dad, always the best at this point! love you guys always..for the money and everything..

*dances with da wolfs at dee Steppes* hooga wooga!! cashing through baby!!!!!

Can't wait for a lot of things recently, these things..have been a mind puller all week round. Can't wait to get to movies this Friday, can't wait to get to kay-ale this weekend, can't wait to get to cousin's boutique (only if we had time and betcha, i am a perfecto time guardian!) and should i too, mention..can't wait to finish my FYP? and can't wait to beat the heck out of myself to stop sleeping to much...freaky lazy....wee~

can't wait can't wait :D

cool, heck, whatever...breaking through.. and i denied my flimsy part-time offer, cashing me 150 bucks for the ITFAIR this weekend due to kemalasan... anywayz, gonna grab an external hdd and it's gonna be at good service for the loves of movies.. *peace* another can't wait for the fair to come about. computer stuff just strings me up like unstrung beads. Just to insert another piece into my wishing list, i wished i had money for a lot of books i'm dying to have..just wisheddddddd..they are so delightedly delicious as i've been browsing through online. CAN'T WAIT!

and i was telling someone about ...

chilivivi (7/4/2007 3:21:30 AM): i feel reset this sem

for that someone, thanxie for the late nite companion, and every bit of you means so much to meee...youuu know me so well and endure all my shits..and also..can't wait to see you tomorrow :"> wee to you~

2007-07-01T00:56:00.000+08:00

Some flashbacks at KL two weeks ago...

MachE Restaurant on Fathers' Day at THE CURVE with the ipoh gals..miss you guys..

Superficials. How many of them one after another?

Why the rights are not right and for every damnation, i suppose, there are certain truth in them but not all definitely. Why? Why? Why?

Sometimes, and only sometimes, the dispute of superficiality is so very frustrating. Most of the time, i do not give a damn, and the sometimes which pierces is where people want me to change for the better of others. i would take things into consideration but NOT under force and unlawful reasons. i am sorting to be less stubborn, but i still hate superficials, and don't you try to be pretentious and being don't care doesn't mean i don't know. And those reasons are definitely shallow and childish i presume. i would be the superficial if i undone the current me..aarhh...comfortable now, and that's the best policy.

What is this weekend with full of additional unnecessary qualms? *yawnz* stay sleepy ne.

But anyhow, had a nice time for Transformers yesterday night at the new cinema, namely MBO at Melaka Mall =D Someone as broke as me would sacrifice RM9 for a show there.
paiseh cheapskate me :P

What life matters..depends the artistry you create on humanity written on the canvas of life.. have some good thoughts, independent ones most importantly...

The painter or potter...no regrets for either or..