/* Editor is LUM MI-FERN --- My Grotesque Caricature*/




Sunday, August 30, 2009

Listening to Gold 90.5FM

Eeeeee...the sidebar is up..thought of reliving the old sidebar coz i'm lazy to do any further coding.. my blog is ugly coz i am lazy

Well, life is pretty comprehensive these days. So much so, everything needed to flow in at the same time. T_T give me break man!!! life, career, thinkings and pregnancy (not mine..hehe) but yeah..have been hiding at home for the past 2 weekends due to some nice weather.. and so crazy in love with oldies lately, addictive yet soothing recumbence. Wanted to disclose my recent fervent was to brood at home.

Yes, i do agree now that when we are selfish, decisions are easily made (quoted). Well, no, life is not meant to be selfish. Sadly, there goes.. I am so sorry to tell you that i am really not up to commitment yet, so i gotta do what i'm suppose to do. I feel really guilty for my negligence on commitment, but please forgive me. I am yet to be 24, so i am still young enough to reason my deflection. I promise i will cover my mistakes, my promises and my negligence all in one. It's not good. I am closing more doors, rather than attempting to open new doors often. I am scolding myself for loosing the humane viscosity. I swear I will not loose it out to this deluged world, but it's hard to hold on sometimes. Give me some space.

Then, life got lifted up to another level. I hope the two BIG decisions i made were right. It seems rational, but doesn't seems right to me....seems ordinary.. doesn't feel correct or certain. Yeahh.. life is always a mess by sudden interception and then come....all the undeciding factors.. *rants -- it's so unfair why am i always the deciding person??? this is leadership torture!!!

However, i do realized at the end of the tunnel, whether it's bright light or dark failure, things still roll on as it is. So why give yourself a hard time? Just give your best shot, and leave the rest to your boss (not god). Perhaps in life, if you wished to go on further, you have to leave some behind. It's the balance of the universe and it could not be helped of.

I will be shifting to a new place soon, a career advancement and puppies running around back home on the 18th September. Should i fly home just to catch a glimpse of those cute little mittens? I thought my diving event in September will be great, but this is even a greater event ..might be the greatest event of 2009! ^_^ Birth is the greatest creation of all.

Aaaahhhhhh....at one time it is one plain grain..at another, gives you enough pressure exhilaration to keep you awake and talk to a long time friend whole night long~

Aaaahhhhhhhh ...LIFE is to blog along. I have written a lot this weekend, the gush of satisfaction just fills. Happy Birthday Malaysia~~ I am definitely coming home one day.

Passion runs in your blood if you are able to discover it's type.




posted by fern at 22:04 0 Comments

Monday, August 17, 2009

Another weekend in Singapore

Hey ya you there!

How you do like my new skin? It's not finished, but i'm lazy to do any further development..let it be it for the mean time. Woot~ lots of space compared to the old skin ^_^

Tired days.. did some room cleaning recently, and found that my wardrobe has grown, and still is growing like nobody's business. Maybe the credit swapping has to stop at all means. I should REALLY stop shopping. The beautiful clothes out there will always meet its owners, which is not you..i mean, which is not me. I still need time to sort my 'one-bag-full-of-duno-wad". And, gotta give myself a tiny applause for doing some fine laundry and house chores during the weekend~

Weekends are always full of silly thinkings.. Weekdays would be full of hoping tomorrow is a saturday~ I need someone to whack me now and then. I'm getting blur at work. i'm waking later everyday to take off to work..PEople think i am a puny idiot, well, i don't mind. i'd rather keep quiet than enlighten you.. There are always transition periods, depends on good or bad ones.. *keep the jolly dude around me.

It's sad that Singapore plays HK movies dubbed in Mandarin. Heck, it really displeasures when you see your dear handsome hongkong boy's mouth miming mandarin out of a cantonese lip sync, not his voice, not the tone that you like..and worse of all, you barely understand if they used some difficult mandarin... it's the same as animes or jap movies dubbed in any other languages as well..imagine watching naruto in vietnamese. i'd rather the original language but an international subtitle like ..English?

Blog is the place for emotion overhauling.. and also to post things you are proud/shame of, or wanna show something that you're shy to disclaim...and NEVER think people don't read your stuff~


Things i could remember, i will remember.

Payday cheque all going to clear my credit bills tomorrow~~~

Night night~

posted by fern at 23:51 1 Comments

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

State of my mind

i wonder if we can control what we are thinking, translates to, what we want to think of. Rather than, all of it culminates into one peak of time, and on another hour, dispersed as a brush of the forehead. I think some are able to do it, controlling what to do, what to choose and even, what to think. If we can lay out clear cut structures in life, where does high and low comes by? Isn't it suffocating, always telling yourself what you should do, what you shan't, what you must, what you musn't? i don't know..some calls it discipline? proper? planning? i think i live outside this line, and never will abide to any .. but i do fairly admit, i always lay out a lot of things.. just that i'm kind of a failure to do it..

i remember reading somewhere that finding yourself is one of the hardest task in life. I'm still trying soul-searching...it really feels good, i feel different from the person i sit next to, talk to or with someone who has close similarities with me. Perhaps getting to know is really important.. i'm still looking around..maybe it's hard, i feel like giving up at times, but logic always tell me that's not logical...

On another note, i'm still waiting for an answer. It has been a month. Wish me luck? :)

Good sufficient rest always makes me another day of needing more and more rest :P

posted by fern at 21:09 1 Comments